Dad and me, but we agreed to keep in touch. At least one relationship with a man in my life was heading in the right direction. Unfortunately, Dad’s visit only left me more tormented about Graham.
***
THE SIGNS WERE EVERYWHERE that night.
Graham had called me to say that Chloe had a high fever and bad ear infection. She apparently couldn’t sleep and asked him to stay and read to her to take her mind off of it. I told him to take care of his little girl and that we would get together tomorrow.
In the meantime, I happened to go online and noticed that Ida had submitted her responses that were to be published in tomorrow’s paper. One of them was the answer to my email. Before reading it, I took my wine glass out of the sink and poured the remainder of the bottle. I took a deep breath to prepare myself.
Dear Theresa,
As much as you appear to be enamored with this man, I think you already know the right answer to your dilemma. All bets are off when there is a child involved.
While you indicate that his ex was the cause for the demise of their relationship, she has apparently come to the conclusion that she made a mistake, one that she wants to rectify for the sake of their child. The fact that the choice to end their relationship wasn’t directly his (but only a result of her straying) leads me to believe that he could still harbor feelings for her. You indicated that they are quite compatible which is, even more, troubling. It sounds to me like this could turn into a messy situation for you as time passes.
You also mentioned that you don’t want to hurt him. Perhaps, if he felt that you wronged him in some way, he would be more likely to get over you quickly. You could, for example, give him the impression that there is someone else in the picture.
Do the right thing and find a man without baggage. Give this one back to his family. When it comes to getting involved with men who have children, I have a motto: smart over heart.
My stomach was in knots. While Ida just helped solidify the conclusion I was starting to draw on my own, it was still hard to absorb the harshness of that reply. I knew that walking away was the right thing to do, but how do you walk away from the best thing that ever happened to you?
She had a point too: there was no way Graham would let me go easily unless he thought I’d betrayed him. Cheating was the one thing he would never tolerate. The thought of deceiving him like that was so painful that it made my skin crawl. I honestly couldn’t see another solution, though. There was certainly no way I could look him in the eyes and tell him I didn’t love him. I had to get him to break up with me out of anger, and there was only one way to do that.
Was I insane for considering pretending to cheat just so he’d leave me? Or was it an honorable and selfless move for the sake of a child’s well-being? I almost couldn’t believe what I was pondering.
After tossing and turning the entire night, I came to a decision and devised a reluctant game plan. Tomorrow, I would give myself one last night with him, enjoy him, let myself love him one last time. Then, I would begin the process of distancing myself until I could figure out how to make it appear that there was someone else. I reminded myself that while I couldn’t go back and change my own childhood, I had the power to change Chloe’s.
This was going to hurt like hell. I couldn’t do it alone. There was only one person I knew who wouldn’t try to talk me out of it.
I picked up my phone and sent a text to Tig.
I need your help.
CHAPTER 27
GRAHAM
THIS PARENTING THING wasn’t for sissies.
Even though Chloe didn’t know I was really her father, I treated her no differently than if she did. I made sure she got to see me almost every day and made her a top priority.
Last night was particularly rough because I’d never dealt with a sick child before. Genevieve thought it would be a good idea if I took the lead in caring for Chloe. If my daughter was going to be spending time at my place