information I can get about her is oxygen to breathe for me. It keeps me going. More than anything it keeps me from doing something I shouldn't do.
Taking what I think of as mine but isn't. I know I can’t have her, that it wouldn’t be right when she trusts me to be her safe place. That doesn’t mean that I don’t want her. It only means that what I want doesn’t matter. To her I am her protector. She just has no idea how unsafe my thoughts are of her.
It doesn't take long until we’re pulling up outside my building. I don’t wait for the driver to open the door. I’m out and heading inside to the private elevator that goes to our floor. I bought the place because of it. Another way to make her feel safe. She didn't need to be trapped in a small space with other people. Especially men. She hates it. A product of her past.
I loathe the idea of another man being anywhere near her. Breathing the same sweet air that is always around her. It is mine.
When I enter the condo, I ditch my jacket, rolling up the sleeves of my shirt before pulling my tie off. I try to make myself look as relaxed as possible. I’ve been told I look like an asshole. It’s probably because I am one. With her I try to be different. Over the past few months I’d finally got her texting me. I want her to know me. I’ve never had that need before.
She keeps getting closer and closer to me. I wasn't going to let her get away. As much as I want her to come out of her shell, I fear she’ll come out too far. That she’ll see she no longer needs me and try to leave the nest I’ve made her.
At least she thinks it's a nest. A safe place. Deep down inside of me I know what it really is. A cage to keep her from leaving. She thinks it's to keep others out. She’s right in a way, but what she hasn’t figured out is that I'm the only one that will ever hold the key.
No one gets in and no one gets out without my say. My reputation of being an asshole isn’t one I haven’t earned.
2
Tinsley
I swing my legs back and forth wondering when Reed is going to get here. He is coming home early. I bite my bottom lip, excited. Carly said he would if I text him. I wasn't so sure, but she was right. Even though the man’s whole life is work, as soon as I contacted him, he dropped whatever it was he was doing. That warmed me inside.
Carly: You take your ugly cardigan off?
I look down at my white cardigan that has pretty pink flowers along the edge. It is my favorite. I unbutton it, letting it drop into my chair before I text her back.
Me: Yes
I send an emoji with its tongue sticking out with my response. I’m not sure why we thought this was going to work. I know nothing about the art of seduction. I might end up falling right on my face and then where would I be? Hopefully not with a roommate that’s suggesting it’s time I move out? Worse, it could get really awkward all the time and I’d have to make myself move out. Fear creeps up my spine at the thought of being out on my own.
Carly: Glasses too!
Grr. I reach up, pulling them off my face. I often forget about them. I only really need them when I’m reading for long hours. It’s a habit of mine. I sit up a little straighter when I hear him enter the house.
Rita peeks over at me from where she is preparing dinner. I duck my head to play with my phone, trying to hide my excitement.
Me: He’s home.
Carly: I knew it! Lick the spoon all sexy when you eat your ice cream.
Yeah, we really suck at this seduction thing. Lick my spoon? Really. I mean, I’m willing to try anything, but that almost sounds like it will get me busted. I wonder where she’s getting these ideas from. I’m guessing she googled it because her romantic life is as non-existent as mine. I’m not even sure why I’m choosing to take her advice on this. But since she’s the only person to walk this earth that I would trust my secrets with, I listen to