The Spark - Jules Wake Page 0,85

much better behaved, but then Toby’s only eight.’

‘And how old are you?’ I asked, shoving my hands in my pockets, crossing my fingers and fervently willing him not to say ten.

‘I’m ten. Nearly eleven.’

Of course he was. Incontrovertible evidence that even now I was trying to deny.

This was my half-brother. The screwed-up monkey baby from the photo that my dad had sent all those years ago.

‘You’re up early,’ I said, my arms resting on top of the fence.

‘When I don’t have to go to school, I don’t mind. And if we want to take the ponies to the beach, we have to get up early, ’cos of the grockles. They don’t like it.’

‘Grockles?’

‘Damn tourists,’ confided the boy – who I knew was called Ben – with decided adult overtones.

I laughed and his eyes widened and he clapped a hand over his mouth, making me wonder which adult he’d picked it up from.

‘Like me?’ I said.

He nodded, mortification setting in.

‘I quite like that word. I’ve not heard it before.’ Trying not to look like some creepy weirdo, I focused on Ben’s face, noting the similarities of his features, and with each one, a little bit of my heart fractured. His eyes were the same shape as mine and exactly the same shade of blue. The arc of his eyebrows identical and his lightly freckled complexion all too familiar. Before I realised it, and too late to get away, because then I would look like some creepy weirdo, I noticed a woman was approaching, holding the reins of another pony with a younger boy atop.

Even if I’d wanted to escape, my feet had other ideas and wouldn’t do as they were told; they had put down roots of their own.

‘Good morning,’ she said. ‘Gorgeous day, isn’t it?’ Letting go of the reins, she climbed onto the fence a foot away from me, looping one leg over to perch on the top rail.

Oh God, was this her? Alicia Harper. My dad’s wife. The woman he’d left us for.

No, she couldn’t be. In my head she was an angular vicious-looking Morticia, with drawn, mean features. This woman was slightly plump, with a peaches-and-cream complexion and a sunny smile that stretched from the corners of her wide mouth to her crinkling eyes. She was far too pretty and wholesome to be Alicia Harper.

‘Yes.’ I nodded, itching to wipe my clammy hands down my shorts. ‘Lovely day.’

‘I think this is the best part of the day. Before everyone gets up and gets involved in everything they have to do.’

‘Yes…’ I wasn’t going to make the mistake of saying his name, so I nodded towards Ben. ‘He said you were going to the beach before it gets busy.’

‘That’s the plan. But we’ve got plenty of time.’ Her eyes never left my face and a sudden flutter of unease unfurled at her words.

‘Well, I ought to be getting back,’ I said, backing away from the fence, ripples of panic dancing in my stomach.

‘It’s Jess, isn’t it?’ she said softly, her smile still warm and friendly.

I just stared at her, my stomach dropping away in freefall. How did she know?

‘Erm … I—’

‘I recognised you from the photos. Lynn sends them.’

My aunt? She sent photos?

‘It’s lovely to meet you, at last. Sorry, that sounds complaining. It’s not. Won’t you come in for a cup of tea? Adrian would so love to see you.’ Quiet empathy burned in her gentle smile. She was so unexpectedly like the good fairy, and so far from my evil stepmother imaginings.

Panic tied my stomach in knots and held my throat in a tight grip. I’d only come to look. This wasn’t supposed to happen. This was supposed to be on my terms.

‘I … I can’t.’

‘You’re always welcome. No pressure, but I think your brothers, Ben and Toby, they’d like to get to know you.’

I flapped my hands in the feeblest gesture, but I was too confused to say anything.

Instead, I backed away into the road.

‘I’ve got to go.’ I finally managed to spit the words out.

Despite my words, she still carried on smiling at me in a way that made me feel pathetic and totally stupid. She was being totally gracious and welcoming and I was acting like a churlish, flighty twit. I hated myself but I didn’t know what else to do.

‘You can come back later. We’ll be here all day. You could come for tea. I promised the boys I’d make scones today. We’ll have clotted cream. Your dad’s favourite, even though that’s