not what a brother does. When I’m feeling less rage-y, we’ll be having that conversation.
But for now? Yeah, so much for keeping our relationship under wraps. It’s only a matter of time before news of this clusterfuck reaches Blue Mountain. And then what? Emma’s concerns about her reputation will be very much warranted.
I can tell she’s working through the same knotty problems in her own head. She’s looking at me but not seeing, gaze hazy not with lust but with fear.
“It’ll be all right,” I say and grab her hand.
She gives me a look that says I’m not so sure.
“You.” I point at Hank. “Stay the fuck away from us.”
Emma startles. “Samuel—”
“This is my family, Em. I’ll handle it.”
She pulls her hand away from mine. “I should go.”
“Emma,” Hank and I say in unison.
“I need some time to think.” She curls her hand around the strap of her bag on her shoulder. “C’mon, Lindsey. We’ll grab something to eat on the way back to my apartment.”
Her apartment. Not her cottage.
I panic. “Please. Don’t do this.”
She meets my eyes. “Please give me time.”
“Em, if I did something—”
“We all did bad things. Really bad things, Samuel. The kind of stuff that can tear apart a family. We need to be the adults in the room so that doesn’t happen. Let’s all take some time to cool off, okay? We could very well end up regretting the things we say now.”
Emma puts a hand on my brother’s chest. “I’m begging you, Hank. Go. Go back home and, I don’t know, get some rest or something. We’ll talk about this in the morning, okay?”
I look at Hank. Hank looks at me.
“Okay,” we say.
Hank and I watch her and her sister go, the two of us frozen to the spot like big, dumb statues.
The silence that settles between us is excruciating.
“I can’t believe this shit,” I say, and I grab the CD and my coat and walk out of there.
Hank is hot on my heels. He follows me out to the parking lot, footfalls heavy on the wet pavement.
“You gotta believe me when I say I tried so fucking hard not to want her. But you were so cold, and I could tell she was struggling. I only meant to help her out. And, well, you know how amazing she is.”
My chest clenches. The thing is, I believe him. Mostly because I was cold. I was a jackass. Hank was there for Emma when I wasn’t. And she is amazing.
My hand shakes when I put it on the handle of my car door. I press my thumb into the indent on the handle, making the locks click, then yank open the door.
“Doesn’t change the fact you kissed her to hurt me.” I climb inside the car.
Hank rests his hand on the top of the door and leans against it. “No, it doesn’t. But it also doesn’t change the fact that you lied to me. Over and over.”
“Go to hell, Hank.”
I shut the door, lock it, and start the engine.
My brother is still standing there when I pull out of the lot.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Emma
I won’t be the reason your relationship with your brother falls apart.
I’ve seen how much you love your family, and I’m not sure you can make peace with them if I’m around.
Driving up the mountain to the farm, I run through a zillion possible lines. Whatever I end up choosing, I have to make it clear to Samuel why we can’t be together.
I have to make him see why I’m leaving Blue Mountain Farm for good.
I told the guys we all needed time to cool off. But it’s clear I’m bad news for the Beauregard family. And if I’m the reason they’re torn apart, what’s left for any of us? If the family goes down, so does the resort.
Everyone’s hearts will be broken. I won’t do that to Samuel, and I won’t do it to the people he loves.
Tears stream down my face.
“Hey.” Lindsey puts a hand on my leg. “You want me to drive?”
“I got it. Thanks, though.” I sniff, wiping my nose with the sleeve of my coat. I didn’t bother taking it off. Now I’m burning up, my insides churning with sorrow and shame and embarrassment.
Of course my perfect older sister was there to witness the spectacle. I can only imagine what my parents will say when she tells them I quit my dream job because I was involved in a love triangle with two of the owners who—get this—are also