when he got down on one knee in Hawaii in the middle of the beach with candles in the shape of a heart and rose petals.
“I have needs, Olivia,” he said. “And I was very stressed.”
“Oh,” I scoffed, “you look really stressed.” I turned to walk toward the door. “You looked so fucking stressed when you did those two lines of cocaine off those girls.” I shook my head. How the fuck didn’t I know he used cocaine? How the fuck was this right under my nose, and I never knew it? I’d been around this shit my whole life, so I knew all the signs. All of them.
“You can’t just leave!” he shouted when I got to the door. I turned around to face him as he stood there naked, and I looked at him. He wasn’t that attractive, if I was honest about it. His balding head showed that he’d had hair plugs. His nose had obviously been fixed. His teeth were all capped.
His body was mediocre, he rocked the dad bod like no one else I knew, and if I finally admitted it to myself, I was with him because he made me feel safe. He took care of me like no one else and made sure I was always okay. He put me first, and I put my head back. “We should discuss this.”
“How long?” I asked him the only question I really cared about. “How long were you faithful?”
“Olivia,” he said. “Baby face.” He called me by the stupid nickname I hated, making me cringe, but then the anger of what I just walked in on took over me. The little piece of sanity I had come undone.
“How fucking long?” I shouted at the top of my lungs. “How fucking long have you been fucking other people?” I waited for it, just standing there. He was naked, and he just … I loathed him. But that was what I was going to end up with. It was what I was going to end up with all along, and to me, it was what I deserved.
“That is not the point,” he said, and I shook my head and laughed out bitterly.
“We’ve had unprotected sex!” I shouted. “So I think the point is, how fucking long, Dominic?” And then it all clicked into place. The all-night meetings he used to have. “Jesus.” I laughed again. “I was so blind.”
“If it means anything…” He looked down. “They don’t mean anything.”
Putting my hand to my chest, I said sarcastically. “That means so much.” I turned around, opening the door. “Goodbye, Dominic.”
I walked down the hallway and waited for him to follow me, but he didn’t. I didn’t know why that hurt more than walking in on him, but it did. That night, I went back to my apartment, and I told Kallie it was over.
She took one look at me and walked to the freezer, grabbing the full-fat ice cream and two spoons. “What are we watching?” she asked, and I put my head on her shoulder and ate ice cream.
“We need to take her in.” I hear now, a groan comes out of me or at least I think I groan. I’m not even sure anymore. When I’m brought back down again into the blackness and the fog.
The door was busted open, pieces of wood flying all over the place. I didn’t even know what was going on, but a gun was suddenly placed beside my temple while people were yelling all around me. “Get fucking down!” the guy yelled from right beside me. I didn’t know what to do, I wasn’t given a choice when he shoved me down to the floor. “I said on the fucking ground,” he said again, his gun didn’t move from the side of my head. This had to be a nightmare, I thought to myself as I was shoved down, the man got on top of me. His gun moved away from my temple, but the feeling was still there. “Hands behind your back.” He pulled my hands behind my back, and the cold steel handcuffs were placed on me, and just like that, my life would never be the same.
“You need to let us help her.” I feel hands on me, and I want to yell out not to touch me. I want to hide in a corner and make sure no one touches me, but I can’t do anything. I can’t move anything. My head burns, and right when