to Home Farm, that’s all.’
‘Of course,’ she said. ‘I’d forgotten you were doing that. I wonder if Joe will make any startling revelations while you’re there?’
‘Who knows?’ I said, wondering if I’d done the right thing in agreeing to get involved in the whole Sam and Joe scenario. ‘But,’ I carried on, ‘I did give Joe my email address in case he needed to alter the arrangements, so I need to log in to check it’s all still on.’
Hope looked slightly sceptical that he would change plans once they were confirmed.
‘You know he has a tendency to come and go,’ I reminded her, ‘and I’d rather check my email account than risk getting sucked into messaging him via social media because that really could be a slippery slope.’
I didn’t of course add that, if Sophie didn’t mind me logging back on, then I was about to write something that had the potential to change the course of my life forever.
*
‘Why don’t you go and sit at one of the tables,’ Sophie said kindly, as she handed her laptop over, ‘you’ll be more comfortable than at the counter. I’ll bring you over a drink in a minute.’
‘Thanks, Sophie,’ I smiled.
My legs were a little shaky as I slid into the last free booth, and my mind was already working through the many and varied sentences I could call on to compose the life-altering email.
‘Here you go,’ said Sophie, just as I was about to start, ‘this’ll cool you down.’ It was a lovely tall glass of iced tea. ‘You look a bit flushed. I hope you’re using sunblock when you’re soaking up the sun, my love.’
I was feeling hot, but it had nothing to do with the weather.
‘I am,’ I told her.
‘I’ll leave you to it then.’
In the end, I stuck to efficient and formal. Tendering my resignation from Tyler PR had to be dealt with professionally. Emotion-laden accusations and explanations addressing the contents of Mum’s diary could come later. Business first had always been Dad’s mantra and, on this occasion, I was willing to stick to it. Once I’d got this out of the way we could revert to being father and daughter again. Perhaps that’s what we would have been better off as all along.
‘Therefore,’ I muttered under my breath, as I read through the mail again before hitting send and setting the wheels in motion, ‘I am resigning from my position in Tyler PR with immediate effect and in the hope that, if you haven’t already, you will promote Chris, enabling him to officially take over my role within the company.’
I hadn’t gone into the whys and wherefores, the details of how I had become increasingly disillusioned with my role and unwilling to babysit and spoon-feed adults who were old enough to know how to behave and conduct themselves. I was certain my resignation would be a big enough shock for Dad to deal with and, even though I was still appalled by how he had treated Mum and their marriage, I felt there was nothing to be gained from rubbing salt into the wound by revealing my distaste for the firm he had spent the best part of his working life growing.
To close the mail, I veered a little on the side of personal, stating that I was in perfect health and happy, although I omitted to mention where I actually was. I knew I was pushing my luck in ‘resigning with immediate effect’ but as it was my Dad who owned the firm, I hoped he wouldn’t use the weight of the law to make me honour a period of notice. That perhaps wasn’t particularly professional of me, but there had to be one perk I could use in my favour after all my years of dedicated service.
‘All done?’ Sophie asked, as I returned the laptop to her yet again.
‘Yes,’ I said, swallowing hard, ‘all done.’
*
I had thought that having finally acted on my decision I would be feeling footloose and fancy-free, but as I later prepared for my visit to Joe’s family farm, I discovered that wasn’t the case at all. I couldn’t pin down the reason why, but the lump I had felt forming in my throat in the café was very firmly fixed and if I turned around, or stood up too quickly, there was a definite feeling of dizziness waiting in the wings to catch me out.
I knew my physical reactions weren’t the result of worrying about the financial implications of what