four of them while the boys were still in the NICU, and she still wore a hospital gown. He was leaning over her shoulder with his arms under hers, and they held one of their boys in each arm, still hooked up to monitors and tubes although neither one of them had been on a respirator.
He had that picture on his nightstand. Framed. They looked young, and in love, and like they had no idea of how very much everything was going to cost.
As it should be, because they didn’t.
That had been the beginning of the end.
And now she was walking toward him, a smile on her face, her hand waving at Houston while she mouthed, “hi,” to Dallas.
Her honey brown hair fell over her shoulders, and her eyes sparkled. She looked amazing. Better than his memories. Older, of course, but beautifully mature, still smiling, still with a confident carriage and the spring in her step he’d always admired. As her eyes went between the two boys, she seemed to skip over him and skip back over. But then, as her hand dropped, and she continued forward, her chin seemed to notch up just a little, and her eyes gazed at him directly.
The nervousness that had disappeared came back in full force, gripping his heart and squeezing hard, before it burst loose, his heart pounding like it was being chased, and he wanted to run with it, away from her.
Toward her.
Both and neither, and he remained rooted where he stood. Waiting. Searching her gaze, wondering what she was thinking, wishing he had the right to step forward and put his arms around her, pulling her toward him, burying his nose in her hair, and feeling her arms wrap around his waist and her body press into his.
He still hadn’t moved by the time she reached them, and she stopped. The boys rushed forward, throwing their arms around her. She put one arm around Dallas while pushing some hair back with her left hand before dropping it and wrapping it around Houston.
She still wore his ring.
He was tempted to look down at his own left hand where his wedding band shone golden and true.
He’d never taken it off. He’d never even been tempted to.
He like seeing the thick band still on her finger as well.
It didn’t mean anything. It couldn’t. But unconsciously he knew he’d been looking for it, and there was some kind of soul-deep satisfaction that settled in his chest upon seeing it.
She still had her arms around both boys’ shoulders, and Dallas was still talking a mile a minute, but her eyes raised to his again.
Man, he hoped his words came out calm and assured and not as a squeak, which was a distinct possibility the way his throat was pinched.
“Hello, Emerson.”
At the sound of his voice, Dallas quit talking and looked at him from where his face was pressed against Emerson’s side.
Again her chin did that little notch-up thing, and her lips pulled back in a polite smile. Not friendly, just polite.
“Hello, Reid. It’s been a while.”
Master of understatement.
Anger flared in his chest. A while? Is that what she called the last eight years? A while?
“Years, Emerson. It’s been years. You can get it right.” Anger laced his tone. He hadn’t even realized he was angry. He didn’t know why he was angry.
“You are correct. My mistake.” She tilted her head down just slightly, acknowledging his accuracy. Which of course made him feel like a jerk for insisting on it.
A while could be considered years. There was no stipulation on it.
Her tone was more stilted than he remembered, more...upper-crust.
His heartbeat seemed to slow and sink. He didn’t want her to change. Not too much. Of course, she had grown older and more mature, as he had. But he wanted the fun country girl that he married, that he’d grown up with, that he’d been best friends with and high school sweethearts with. Who’d been his girlfriend all through college. He wanted her. Not this straitlaced, prim and proper and prissy city-slicker businesswoman that stood in front of him.
Maybe she was disappointed in him too.
The jeans he wore probably weren’t ten years old, but they were just like the ones he wore ten years ago. He was still that man. Hadn’t changed a bit.
That probably disappointed her.
There was no point standing here. He didn’t know what he thought was gonna happen when they first saw each other after eight years apart, but he’d pretty much ruined it with