the lass and didn’t mistake the asking in her eyes for more. The dance changed, and he passed her onto another clansman while he took the arm of his cook. The rotund woman laughed at having him as a partner and Ben laughed too, for the first time that night.
The dance went on, and when he turned to take his final partner’s hand, pleasure almost brought him to his knees. Kenzie.
“Ye look beautiful this eve, lass. A gift given to us through time.”
“Now you’re flattering me, Ben?” Her tone sounded bored and dread coiled in his gut. He pulled her out of the dance and walked her a little out of the light and away from his clansmen.
“I owe ye an apology for handling ye roughly yesterday in the water, making ye wash yourself as if the thought of ye having my child repulsed me.”
Her emerald eyes met his and he fought not to pull her into his arms and kiss her. Show her just how sorry he was for acting the medieval ass.
“Are ye repulsed by the thought of me pregnant with your baby?”
“Nay, never that. Ye know that Aline died after having Alasdair. Well, the reason behind her death was not only because of the child but a tumor in her womb. The clan healer believed it at first to be another child, but during the birth it became known that it was not. She bled to death in my arms. I will not risk another woman for the sake of offspring.”
Kenzie sighed. “Life is a risk, Ben. Living in this time, you, of all people, should know this. You cannot save everyone. It’s not possible.”
She was right, and yet the guilt of tupping Aline each and every night in order to have a child still tormented him. He’d not had a care for her health, having not thought he’d lose her solely due to having a baby. But his tupping had been her death sentence, and he couldn’t forgive himself for that. No matter what Aline had said on her deathbed or what Kenzie said now. His wife was dead, and it was his fault.
“Just so you know, there is no threat to me in regard to having your child. No doubt you’re aware that women bleed once a month. Well, let’s just say my once-a-month has started.”
He would be lying if he said he didn’t feel an overwhelming sense of relief. Ben said a silent thank you to God and pushed a flyaway lock of her hair behind her ear. “I’m sorry for yesterday, lass. Say ye forgive me.”
She half-smiled up at him, and for the first time since their fight, it was as if the sun shone in the middle of the night. “I’m sorry, too.”
“I want to kiss ye so much, lass,” he said, leaning down and whispering the words against her ear.
“Why don’t you then?” She raised her brow, tempting him beyond thought or reason.
“There ye are, my liege. Brother has already returned to the castle, and I have no one to escort me.” Athol took Ben’s arm, and Kenzie stepped away, giving him space.
“I see Bruce is headed back, but I am not just yet, lass.” Ben yelled out to Bruce who turned and came toward them. He ignored the annoyed glare Athol threw up at him.
“Take Lady Athol up to the keep, Bruce, and ensure she reaches her room safely. I’m not returning yet.”
Bruce nodded, gesturing for Athol to walk beside him, which she did reluctantly while throwing dirks at Kenzie.
Once alone with the few clansmen still celebrating Beltane, Ben poured them both a tumbler of ale and handed one to Kenzie. “Here’s hoping the crops will be blessed and plentiful,” he said, a loud cheer coming up from his men and tenants.
“Here here,” Kenzie said, clapping her cup against his. “And here’s to the Laird of Ross. Shall he prosper, be free of war, and live a long and happy life,” Kenzie said for only him to hear.
Without thought, Ben leaned down and kissed her, not caring who saw or what they thought. He’d wanted to kiss her all day, beg her forgiveness and grovel, if need be.
Kenzie wrapped her arms about his neck and deepened the kiss, and for a time, he lost all thought. Och, what a sweet, smart lass was wont to do to a man and he’d not always have this woman in his arms. So best to make the most of it while he could.
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