best song that you’ve ever written,” Ethan said. “And you know I like all your stuff.”
“Thanks. I’m really happy with it. Any ideas or changes?”
“No, said Colin. “That’s why we are going to get it recorded now before you think too much and change it.”
The rest of the day was dedicated to getting a perfect track. We listened to it over and over and the three of us were happy with the final result.
Before I left, Ethan asked, “Max, are you going to let Rainey hear it.”
“No.”
“You wrote it about her.”
“I guess it’s pretty obvious, huh?”
“Only to those of us who know you both. You have to sing it at the concert.”
“I probably will.”
“You have to Max. Everyone is going to love it. You’ll see.”
I drove home wondering how I would sing those words to a crowd of strangers and not feel completely exposed. I wondered if it made any sense to sing the words to everyone but the one person they were meant for.
Chapter 31
Rainey
Saturdays’ were not the same since Max and I had parted ways. Instead of meeting Sophie and Rylee at Colin’s house, I now met them at whatever mall or activity we had planned. Sometimes Caitlynn joined us, sometimes Kara did too. Mostly it was just the three of us and I cherished our time together. They had both become dear friends.
On this particular Saturday rain was in the forecast so we opted for an indoor mall. Rylee was looking for sandals and by lunchtime she had tried on dozens of pairs and rejected each and every one.
“Rainey, we need to tell you something,” Sophie said, as we read our menus.
I was trying to decide between a burger and a salad when my heart lurched at her words. “What?” I asked quietly, waiting to hear that Max had a girlfriend or something equally horrible. From her tone I knew it could only be about Max.
“Next weekend Max is going to open for Colin at a concert.”
“Oh! That’s wonderful! You scared me,” I said laughing, “I thought it was something bad.”
“No, not at all. It’s good news, it’s just that there is this song that he will be singing. It’s called, “The Saddest Song.”
“He finally wrote the words? Is it about Garrett?” I had always wanted him to finish it.
“We haven’t heard it yet, “Ry said, but it definitely isn’t about Garrett. They said it’s about you.”
“Me?”
They nodded at the same time.
“Colin says that Max put so much emotion into that song because he is miserable without you,” Sophie said, reaching across the table to put her hand on mine.
“Don’t you miss him too?” Rylee added.
“Every moment of every day,” I said, without hesitation.
“Then why are you two torturing yourselves like this?”
I had no answer.
“Rainey, you have to go to the concert and hear his song.”
“Oh, I can’t Sophie. I would probably make him uncomfortable.”
“Nope. He won’t even know you are there, “ Rylee grinned.
“What do you mean?”
“After he gets on the stage we are going to sneak you in backstage.”
They looked at each other and seemed happy with their plan.
“No. No way.”
“It was actually Ethan that thought of it. He thinks you really need to hear it.”
“No. I can’t. You guys don’t understand.”
Sophie sighed as if she expected to have to talk me into it. “You are over thinking things, Rainey. Max obviously loves you and we know you love him. We aren’t blind.”
“He’s my boyfriend’s brother. It’s so messed up.”
“Rainey, be honest with yourself. Garrett has been gone a long time. You are allowed to love another person.”
“I do love him, but..”
“Not like a brother!” Rylee interrupted. “Don’t you dare say that! Nobody kisses their brother the way you kissed Max on New Year ’s Eve.”
I felt my cheeks heat in embarrassment and covered my face with my hands. I groaned, “This is a mess!”
“No, it’s stupid. I’m sorry Rainey, but you need to let your heart make its own decisions. You and Max are perfect together. Quit fighting fate. You can’t win. You’re just stomping on your own happiness.”
“And Max’s!” Rylee added. “You are both completely miserable apart.”
“Please Rainey, please just go listen to him sing and if you want to leave afterwards he won’t even know you were ever there.”
“Okay, “I said, giving in. They both looked pretty pleased with themselves and I hoped that I was making the right decision.
A few days later I had decided that I just couldn’t go. If Max wanted me to be there then he would have