The Saddest Song - By Susie Kaye Lopez Page 0,15
you think?”
“And you knew I needed a distraction because…”
“You’re stressed out about going back to school. Are you really that worried about it? The worst thing that can happen is just everyone will be talking about the worst thing that already did happen.”
“Exactly.” She threw her head back and groaned. “ I don’t want to go!”
“Well, in the scheme of things it seems pretty uneventful to me.”
“I just feel like I will be so exposed. I want to hide and lick my wounds.”
“Well, unfortunately you’re not a cat. But if it helps I will be there to deflect some of the unwanted attention.”
“I know that. It’s just that I keep wondering what Garrett would do if I had died instead. I know he would have survived so much easier.”
“Rainey, stop. That’s not true, and it’s not what happened.”
“I know Max, my mind just keeps going off on tangents all its own.”
“I hear ya. I think it’s happening to all of us.” I pulled into the parking lot and we both watched for a space. We got lucky with someone leaving and soon we were spreading our towels out on the warm sand. I grabbed the sunscreen and began to apply it to my chest while Rainey removed her dress. She was wearing the white bikini that she had worn at the beginning of the summer and I winced at the way her perfect figure had become all jutting hip bones and ribs. She had lost so much weight and she hadn’t had any to spare in the first place. I rubbed the coconut scented lotion over my own protruding ribs and thought we looked like the holocaust survivors I had seen in my history book.
“Max, you are so obvious. We look awful. Thank goodness nobody is with us. We are going to have to go on an In and Out Diet and drink chocolate shakes and eat burgers until we get back to normal weigh before we have to go to school. Hope your mom packed something fattening for this picnic.’”
“Don’t most girls have fantasies about eating anything they want?”
“Not this one.” She pushed her hair off her face, straightened her sunglasses and relaxed into the sand.
“Well, it could be a way to make our folks happy. Mom and her after school baked goods will fatten us up and put a smile on her face. Win-win.” Rainey smiled and for just a moment I felt like I’d won a prize.
Chapter 7
Rainey
The first day of my senior year was as sad as I expected it to be. To survive it Max and I rode together in the black pickup truck the twins had shared. I had ridden to school with them every morning since they got it, seated happily in the middle of the cab, the twins taking turns driving. They had loved and fought over their truck, always trying to talk the other one into letting them have it for a Friday or Saturday night. Now it was all Max’s, but I knew he would give anything to have his brother back to share it with him. It was hard to pull into the familiar parking spot and climb out without having a quick kiss from Garrett before my heavy backpack was thrown effortlessly over his shoulder.
I climbed out of the truck, carrying my new backpack, wearing my new clothes and Max gave me a tight smile. With a deep breath, we walked slowly across the parking lot and headed towards campus and the sight of our fellow students greeting each other happily. As soon as they saw us the laughter and smiles were replaced with sad expressions of sympathy for the two of us. I felt nauseated as we made our way to our lockers.
“Rainey!” Caitlynn shouted, and I was suddenly engulfed in a cloud of Chanel perfume and a hug that made me self conscious. I pulled away and felt all the pity stares that Cait seemed not to notice.
“Hi Max! How are you?” She hugged him next, giving him a concerned look. She had been a little in love with Max since freshman year. We used to dream of double dates but I realized a long time before Cait did that it wasn’t going to happen. I just never wanted to be the one to tell her.
“I’m doing alright. Are you ready for the first day?” He asked, deflecting the attention from his mental state.
“If by ready you mean already wishing it was Friday, then, yes,” Cait