I can’t rightly say.” He sighed. “That’s part of the problem, Cora. I miss the road. I miss seeing new things. This world is so small and yet so big. And we’re stuck on a lake in New Hampshire.” He snorted. “Imagine that, of all places.”
“So why not move?”
“Because we can’t.” He waved his hand. “An issue for another time. Don’t worry about that yet.”
She rubbed her hand over her face. And she thought talking to Simon was hard to track sometimes. “Okay. Sure.”
They fell silent as she thought through her questions. She had so many. Resting her foot on the bench, she wrapped her arms around her leg. The lurching of the wagon wasn’t uncomfortable. In some weird way, it was kind of relaxing. She didn’t feel in danger from Clown or the Faire. She should be terrified. But she wasn’t.
Things she should be afraid of were so numerous now, she had to readjust her expectations. The bar had gone up considerably in the past few weeks.
Shockingly, she wasn’t the one to break the silence. It was Clown. Or the Faire. Or both. Whatever they were. He furrowed his brow. “I have a question.”
“You’re asking me something? That’s rich.”
“I don’t understand humans. Never have, never will.” He made a face. “Weird creatures, you are.”
She chuckled and shook her head. It wasn’t worth arguing the point. He was right, after all. “Whatever. Shoot. What’s your question?”
“What on Earth was Simon trying to accomplish just now, when he made you try to summon the power within you? He doesn’t seem to want to die. But he wanted me to consume him. What the hell was he doing?”
“I think he had a suspicion about what happened, and he wanted to see if he was right.” She thought it over for a long time before letting out a breath. “He’s also the kind of guy that when he sees a hornet’s nest, has to pick up a stick and smack it.”
“Why?”
“To see how badly it hurts to get stung. He expects the worst of everything and everyone, and if it’s going to happen anyway, it might as well be on his terms.” She looked over at him. Clown—the Faire—was looking off with one eye squinted again, as if straining to understand. “You really did a number on him when you took him.”
“He was already broken when he got to me.” He shrugged a shoulder. “It was going to happen eventually. If I didn’t take him, his life would have been far worse, believe me. It wouldn’t have even been four years before he—” He turned his head to her for a moment, looked embarrassed, then shook his head. “Never mind.”
“What? What were you going to say?”
“Nothing.”
“Can you see into our futures?”
“Of course.” He shrugged again. “It’s easy enough. I see all things that could be, will be, and will not be, as if they all are. The past, the present, the future…I’m not a fish in the river like you are. I’m not even the fisherman. I’m the river. The trees. The rocks that make the shore.” He smiled. “It’s so easy to see it all from where I am.”
“What would have happened to Simon if you hadn’t taken him?”
“You don’t want to know.”
“I really do.”
He rubbed a hand over his bald head and slumped back against the wall of the wagon. “Fine. Fine. But he isn’t that man anymore.”
“He’s pointed that out a few times.”
“He would have been married to Suzanna for a few years. They would have had two children. Beautiful little things. Then, one night, his madness would consume him. He would kill them all. He would bleed them dry and use the gore to paint a masterpiece. One whose recipe he would have said was whispered to him by the gods. He would hang for his crimes. The public would believe his canvas of death to be destroyed, but it would go to a collector of the occult. It would be worshipped. Many more people would die for hundreds of years afterward by people trying to recreate what they believe was Simon’s true vision. That was his path.” He looked to the overcast sky. “People who are killers are killers. They always are, always were, and always will be. No matter the path they take.”
She covered her mouth with her hand and looked away. She didn’t know why that made her sick. She didn’t know why it brought tears to her eyes. He loved Suzanna so much. I know