but Jennings holds me fast against his side before turning me to face him directly.
Then he’s kissing me as if we’ve got all night instead of mere moments before Kevin and I slip into the security line. “You’ve got this. You’ll be fine,” he reassures me.
I shake my head, but before I can speak, his words stop me. “You have to, because otherwise, how will I? ’I need to know you’re going to be okay because my heart aches so damn bad, I feel like I’m going to die.”
“Jennings,” I whisper his name. I reach up and stroke the softness of his beard. Memorizing it, him.
“I promise you’ll get through this. And soon we’ll be together again. You have everything you need to make it through, Kara,” he whispers harshly.
“What’s that?” I ask, because right now, I need to know.
“My whole world. I need you to take care of it for both of us.”
“And who’s going to take care of you?” I ask wonderingly, finally finding my voice.
He shakes his head, the movement making his beard brush back and forth against my palm. It sends shivers racing up my body, warming me when I’d begun to think I might die from the cold seeping inside me from the thoughts of leaving him. “I’ll have you and Kevin looking out for me. It might be long distance, but that doesn’t mean you’re going to love me any less. Does it?” A hint of vulnerability crosses his face.
“Never.” Realizing Jennings’s pain is as close to the surface as my own, I pull his head down and tell him the final truth I never shared. “Last time I left Alaska, I was in so much pain because I was scared and alone. What was I going home to? When we came back, Kevin and I were empty from the loss of Dean and Jed. Now, I’m getting on a plane to go home, and I don’t want to leave because my heart’s finally stopped hurting.” I try to make him understand in the final seconds we have. “Jennings, it’s you who flung our souls back up into the air.” Pressing my lips against his shocked ones a final time, I whisper against them. “That’s because of your love. Now, I don’t want to leave, but…”
“But the sooner you get home, the sooner I can do what I need to in order to be with you.” He turns me forward, and we move again.
“Yes.” The word is a single statement that encompasses my willingness to believe in John Jennings as a father and as the man I love. Spotting Kevin, I break away from Jennings.
The porter sees me head for check-in. After a few moments, and wincing painfully at the luggage fees hitting my card, I quickly give the man a tip.
Jennings refuses to let us handle our carry-ons until we reach the security checkpoint. Tipping his head back, he swallows before he grates out, “This is it for me.” His head whips around, torment stamped on every feature of his face. I’m about to panic until I feel Kevin’s hand settle at my shoulder. “Son, you take care of your mother like we talked about?”
“I will, Dad.” Kevin lets me go and steps forward. If it wasn’t for the clothes and the beard, I almost wouldn’t be able to tell where one began and one ended in their embrace. “Love you, Dad,” Kevin mumbles.
“Love you too, son. Always, forever. I’ll be there sooner than you think. And use that phone often. Just not while you’re in class,” he says sternly.
My lips twitch despite themselves.
“Yes, sir,” Kevin mutters as he steps back to give me and Jennings as much privacy as he can.
“I’m not sure I can do this,” I cry softly. I may be the most practical person in the world but not when it comes to Jennings.
“Yes, you can,” he murmurs, as he slides his strong arms around me. I lean into his strength for the last time for God only knows how long. “We both can, because there’s no flying away from this, Kara. We’re only going to get our old lives sorted so we can determine where we’re going together.”
I hear the pounding of his heart under my ear. “Don’t think just because you haven’t been to our apartment you haven’t lived there.” I pull back to look in Jennings’s eyes. “I’ve been looking in your eyes every single day since the moment Kevin took on your coloring. Genetics be