way.
He held out the bag he'd brought for me, the calm and confident look on his face conveying his total comfort in dealing with my mother.
So I left him to it.
I didn't have it in me to deal with her until I'd caffeinated myself.
I slipped back into Cary's room and found him awake.
Just the sight of him made the tears well and my throat close up tight.
He was such a strong and vibrant man, so full of life and mischief.
It was the worst pain to see him looking so broken.
"Hey," he muttered.
"Quit the waterworks every time you see me.
Makes me feel like I'm gonna die or something."
Hell.
He was right.
My tears didn't do him any good.
Instead, what little relief they gave me just put more of the burden on him.
I needed to be a better friend than that.
"I can't help it," I said, sniffling.
"It sucks.
Someone beat me to it and kicked your ass before I could."
"Is that right?" His scowl faded.
"What'd I do now?" "You didn't tell me about Brett and Six-Ninths."
"Oh yeah ."
A bit of his old sparkle came back into his eyes.
"How'd he look?" "Good.
Really good."
Very hot, but I kept that thought to myself.
"Although right now, he might not look much better than you."
I told him about the kiss and the resulting fight.
"Cross threw down, huh?" Cary shook his head, then winced and stopped.
"Taking on Brett took guts - he's a barroom brawler who loves a good fight."
"And Gideon is a trained mixed martial artist."
I began digging through the bag Gideon had brought.
"Why didn't you tell me Captive Soul had signed with a major label?" "Because you didn't need to fall into that hole again.
There are girls who can date rock stars; you're not one of them.
All that time on the road, all those groupies .
You'd drive yourself and him insane."
I shot him a look.
"I'm in total agreement with you.
But I'm insulted that you'd think I'd run back to him just because he made it big."
"That's not why.
I didn't want you to hear their first single if it could be helped."
"'Golden'?" "Yeah ."
He studied me as I headed toward the bathroom.
"What'd you think of it?" "It's better than a song titled 'Tapped That.'" "Ha!" He waited until I came out again with my face washed and hair brushed.
"So .
you kissed him."
"That's the beginning and end of that story," I said dryly.
"Have you talked to Trey since Friday?" "No.
They've got my phone somewhere.
My wallet, too, I'm guessing.
When I came to, I was here, wearing this" - he pinched at his hospital gown - "freakin' thing."
"I'll get your stuff for you."
I dumped my toiletries back in the bag, then went to sit in the chair beside him with my coffee in hand.
"Gideon's making arrangements to get you home with a private nurse."
"Ooh .
that's a fantasy of mine.
Can you make sure the nurse is hot? And single?" My brows rose.
Inside, though, I was so relieved to see him looking and sounding more like himself.
"You're obviously feeling better, if you're feeling frisky.
How did things go with Trey?" "Good."
He sighed.
"I'd worried that the party wouldn't be his scene.
I forgot that he knew a lot of the people already."
Cary and Trey had met at a photo shoot, with Cary modeling and Trey assisting the photographer behind the camera.
"I'm glad you had a good time."
"Yeah.
He was totally set on not getting laid."
"So you tried .
after you said you wouldn't."
"This is me we're talking about."
He rolled his eyes.
"Hell yeah, I tried.
He's hot and great in bed - " " - and in love with you."
He released his pent-up breath in a rush, wincing as his chest expanded.
"No one's perfect."
I had to bite back a laugh.
"Cary Taylor.
Loving you isn't a character defect."
"Well, it's not very smart.
I was such an asshole to him," he muttered, looking disgruntled.
"He could do so much better."
"That isn't your decision to make for him."
"Someone needs to make it."
"And you're volunteering because you love him, too."
My mouth curved.
"Don't you think that sounds ass- backwards?" "I don't love him enough."
All traces of levity were wiped from his face, leaving behind the wounded and lonely man I knew all too well.
"I can't be faithful like he wants.
Just him and me.
I like women.
Love them, actually.
I'd be cutting off half of who I am.
Just thinking about it makes me resent him."
"You fought too hard to accept yourself," I said softly, remembering that time with more than a little twinge of sadness.
"I totally understand and don't disagree, but have you tried talking to Trey about it?" "Yes, I talked