feeling to my mates. I honestly couldn’t tell you how long we even rode in the carriage, but it felt like around an hour or so, my gaze traveling across each and every person we passed. When we passed two girls younger than myself who were laughing about something and walking along the paved road, I couldn’t help but smile at their obvious friendship.
It also had me missing Jordan.
I hoped that everything was going okay back home. Not only with the aspect of her finding her mates—well, at least one of them—but everything else that I had brought into the realm of their pack. My hands tightened on my skirt, thinking about how Lorn and Pastor Malcolm were both locked up there, being questioned. A momentary surge of panic brushed through me until I let out a steady breath, remembering that neither of them could affect me here. We were literally in a different realm, and that concept made me feel moderately better. Until I considered the fact that them being on the pack lands meant that Jordan and her family were in danger because of me. I knew now that no one else viewed it that way, but I couldn’t help the sense of guilt that had my gut tightening, feeling as though I was responsible for bringing both problems into their lives and my mates’ lives.
If I had never come to Washington, none of this would have been an issue. I mean, I also would have been locked up, imprisoned, and eventually sacrificed to a witch coven apparently… but still, they wouldn’t have to deal with any of this. I also would have never met my mates, something that sent a dagger-like sensation through my entire being as a panicked noise left my throat.
I was confused when Henry suddenly pulled me onto his lap, my arms wrapping around his neck as I buried my nose against his throat, both his words and Marco’s not making sense to me as I tried to settle my heart, which felt like it was going a million miles an hour. I knew this was a panic attack. A smaller one, but very much a panic attack, and I took slow and even breaths, trying to calm myself down like Jordan had helped me do that one day. The concept of seeing the pack therapist she mentioned once again came to mind as I considered bringing it up to the boys for when we got back to Washington.
“Maya?” Henry’s voice had me finally looking up as I breathed through the guilt I was feeling. I could see the knowledge in his gaze as I just brushed my nose against his shoulder, knowing that this was something I had to work through to some extent. My mates would never make me feel guilty, even if something was my fault.
“My dragon is freaking out,” Marco admitted, his voice sounding pained and far closer than I realized. “Maya, baby girl, I need you to try to breathe through this. You know this isn’t your fault and you are not to blame. At all. Especially not for Pastor Malcolm, and for sure not for fucking Lorn.”
“I get what you’re saying,” I admitted softly, tilting my head against Henry as I met Marco’s gaze. “I really do. It just… it just doesn’t remove the guilt. I can’t help but feel like I brought this all to you. I mean, I literally did—”
“And we wouldn’t want it any other way,” Henry assured me softly. “I mean, I would prefer to kill both of them, but I would take all of these fuckers bothering us every day if it meant you being in our life.”
“Yeah?” I asked quietly.
“Absolutely,” Henry confirmed, and I melted into him, Marco’s entire disposition relaxing as I felt relief through our bond.
All too soon, my eyes widened as the light outside of the window changed, our carriage falling into the shadow of the massive castle. The gilded building shone against the sunlight as we pulled past the busy front and around the side. Honestly, the place wasn’t like any depiction of a castle I’d ever seen before. It was made of marble and golden features that highlighted these massive fire-like columns that surrounded it. Sandstone surrounded it and covered the path leading in, almost creating an illusion that made it waver, as if it wasn’t really there. The large open archway windows above glinted with a sapphire blue that decorated the inside walls and made me