the question out. “I mean sleep in the same bed. Like this. Not... I wasn’t asking about sex!”
“Oh. Okay.” It sounds like he’s smiling now. “Um, I don’t think so. Not like this. Whenever I’ve traveled with clients, I always had a separate room.”
“I’m sorry you don’t have it now. I should have just insisted we keep the hotel rooms.”
“No, it’s fine. I meant it when I said it’s no big deal. I was just answering your question. About sleeping in the same bed like this. I don’t think I have since I’ve always had my own rooms.”
Because I’m interested, I turn onto my side. I can only see him dimly in the dark, but at least I’m pointed in his direction. “But you’ve had sex with some of them.”
“Y-yes.” The mattress moves as he turns over to face me too.
“Didn’t you sleep with them after you, uh, slept with them?”
“Not really. I didn’t spend the night with any of them. We would just have sex and then I’d leave.”
“Oh. That doesn’t sound very romantic.”
He chuckles softly. “Well, it wasn’t, but it wasn’t supposed to be. I tried to be careful about sex. It wasn’t part of the package. I mean, I wasn’t getting paid for it, so I tried to keep the lines clear as much as I could.”
“Wouldn’t they give you extra for it?” Maybe that’s an indelicate question, but it just comes out.
“They’d tip me. But like I said before, sex could absolutely not be on the books with Companions for Hire. Aurora and Weston are incredibly careful about that. They’re not going to let their business get in trouble. So I only had sex with a client if I actually wanted to. If we were in sync. If I liked them and thought we’d both enjoy it. Most clients I wouldn’t have sex with.”
“They wouldn’t ask?”
“Oh yes, some would ask. But if I didn’t want to, I’d just tell them no. As graciously as I could.”
“So it was just regular sex? I mean, you weren’t really getting paid for it?” If I were wiser, I probably wouldn’t pursue this conversation under these particular circumstances, but I’ve never pretended to be wise.
His shoulders move, and I imagine him shrugging in that dismissive way he has. “Eh. It wasn’t like relationship sex. Maybe kind of like one-night-stand sex. But even then... there are boundaries, and I wasn’t going to cross them. They did always tip me afterward. Sometimes very generously. So it was... transactional. But that was the way it was supposed to be. I worked hard to keep it that way.”
“How did you manage it? In the way you had sex?”
“Maybe some. I mean, I would definitely not murmur sweet nothings in their ears or anything like that. But mostly afterward. I’d always leave things in a businesslike way. No romantic kisses good night or anything. No promises of more. Most of them felt the same way, so it was never a problem.”
“But not all of them?”
“Well, some of them wanted more. It’s inevitable. If I could tell a client was hoping for a relationship, I’d never have sex with her. And usually I’d stop seeing her. But occasionally I was mistaken. I mean, I thought a client understood what we were, but I’d discover she wanted long-term. Every once in a while, it got... messy.”
“I guess that’s inevitable too.”
One thing is for sure. I don’t want Damian to think his thing with me is getting messy. I’ll definitely never let him know that I got off just now in the shower to the thought of him.
I get a little tingly at just the memory of how hard I came earlier, so I quickly force the thoughts away. That’s definitely too dangerous for being in the same bed as him.
“Yeah.” Damian’s voice is soft. Reflective. I really don’t know what he’s thinking.
“Did you like it?”
“Like what?”
“Being an escort. Or a companion. Or whatever you called yourself. Did you like it?”
“I don’t know. It was a job. Same as any job. Some parts were good and some weren’t. I made good money. Better than I ever could have made in any other way.”
“But you didn’t want to keep doing it?”
“Not forever. After a while it got kind of... draining. It pulled on me in a way I didn’t like. Plus I got so busy with graduate work that I really didn’t want to take the time. It was fine for a while, but it’s not how I see