a bit more, and it will get better. I lied to myself because there would always be some other event, like our wedding. Oh God, our wedding—we had not even begun to talk about it. I did not want to think about it. I reached up to run my hands through my hair, but a firm grip stopped me. I turned to Iskandar to see him frowning.
“Sir, you both will survive this. Now, please stop fidgeting. You will ruin your hair,” he said.
I chuckled. It was the only amusing thing I’d heard in a while. “Iskandar, I did not think you cared so much. I expect this kind of thing from Wolfgang.”
He made a face at the mention of Wolfgang’s name, so I had something new to distract myself with. “What is it with you two? Why are you always so hard on him?”
“I am firm with everyone.”
“Yes.” I nodded while thinking about it. “Yes, but it is only when I say Wolfgang’s name that your stony face changes slightly.”
“I do not know what you are talking about, sir.”
“Yes, sure. If I did not know better, I would say you...” my voice trailed off as the doors opened. Turning back, my heart started to beat faster, and I could hear the sound of heels as they made their way to me. I wanted to see her, to get to hold her hand finally. However, the beautiful woman who walked toward me was not the beautiful woman I knew and thought I was waiting for. Her big curls were now straight, and she wore a small pink hat on the side of her head and a manufactured smile. Beyond that, I could not see anything else anymore.
“Hi, have you been waiting long?” she asked gently, her voice barely a whisper...and dull. I wanted to reach out and shake her.
“No,” I finally managed to say. I forced a smile myself. “You look beautiful, as always.”
“Thank you. Are you ready? Oh, I need to stand on this side.” She shifted to my left quickly.
And I could see her checking off a list of things she had to do and where she had to stand. Before I even offered her my arm, she placed her hands where she must have practiced they should be. She was not looking at me, still lost in thought. She was standing right here and yet was so far away.
“Odette,” I called, trying to bring her back.
“Yes? Did I do something wrong?” She looked up at me in panic, and that was like an arrow through me because I knew for sure the crown had done what it always did. It chipped away at the person to make sure they fit.
“No, you are doing everything right.” You are dying.
And it brought me utter despair to see her misery, but I was still glad she was here, so I put my hand over hers, tapping slightly, and smiled. “Let us go see the world.”
She took a breath and nodded. I tried to focus as we walked from the east wing of the palace down to the gardens. But her silence only further disturbed my mind. What was going through her head? How had she been for the last few days? Weeks? What was going on with her sister? How were her tutors? It was maddening how so much had happened and how little I knew of her. This was custom? This was tradition, not having any real free or private time to talk to your future wife until you were married? I guess it made sense when most marriages, except for my father’s, was arranged. But in the modern world, it seemed ridiculous. It was even more ridiculous considering that we were already married.
“Gale! Odette!”
Before I even open my mouth, I felt Odette curtsy beside me to both Eliza and my mother, who stood at the double glass doors, guards standing at each end, preparing for us to step out into the garden.
“Just as I thought. You look very nice like this,” my mother said, putting on her gloves and nodding only once as she took in all of Odette.
“Thank you, Your Grace,” Odette replied with little to no emotion at all.
Does anyone else feel as though all oxygen is being sucked from around us?
“Where is Grandmother?” Eliza asked as she moved to stand on my left. “Did she not arrive already?”
“The queen mother’s flight was canceled due to poor weather, and thus, she is unable to attend this morning,”