fingers together. “I was two seconds away from embarrassing anyone who happened to drive by.”
“How so?” I asked, my question coming out ragged.
“Because I came close taking you against that wall and showing you just how delicious I think you are.”
Heat enveloped my body as fire coursed through my veins at his husky words. “And that would be embarrassing to them, how?”
“Because they’d be jealous that they’re missing out.”
I let out a low chuckle. “Well, we don’t want that to happen, do we?”
“Hell no. But I promise you, if you don’t change your mind, the first place I take you won’t be against a wall.”
“Oh,” I said with a gasp as the visual filled my brain.
Stellan chuckled as if he knew where my mind had gone. “Let me see your phone.”
“Um, okay.” I pulled my phone from my pocket and handed it over to him.
“Can you unlock it for me?”
“Oh, sorry.” He held out my phone, and I quickly input the code.
I watched as he quickly typed something and then handed the device back to me.
“I put my number in there. If you don’t change your mind, you know how to reach me.”
“I won’t be changing my mind,” I said, lifting my chin in determination as I put my phone away.
“I guess we’ll see.”
“We will.”
Stellan only winked at me, and I turned to walk back to my car. I refused to allow myself to think about what had happened as I drove, since distracted driving, especially when tired, wasn’t safe. Thankfully, no one else was on the road, and I made it home in one piece.
Only once I had stripped down to my boxers and was lying under the scratchy sheets did I give my mind the all clear to run away with itself. But it didn’t. Instead, it just decided to play back the fiery kisses Stellan and I shared until I found myself reaching for the lube so I could stroke myself to release.
Having the memories of his lips against my skin, strong hands firmly pressing into my hips, and his ragged breathing in my ear was all the help I needed. As my hand worked furiously over my cock while precum dripped over my fingers, it wasn’t long until my body was stiffening and my back arching as I came.
Rather than immediately cleaning up, I laid there with a cum-covered hand and stomach as I tried to catch my breath. That time, there wasn’t any confusion or embarrassment that I’d jacked off to him. Instead, my entire body was humming, and my skin tingled as a reminder of where he’d kissed me earlier.
I still couldn’t explain why I was feeling this way, but Stellan was wrong. I wouldn’t have any regrets when I woke up later that day. It made no sense to me why this was happening now, but did everything need an explanation? I didn’t think so. It was like some of my friends who were gay or bisexual told me: you can’t help whom you’re attracted to. And I was very attracted to Stellan.
I finally mustered the energy to climb out of bed and clean myself, and only once I was back under the sheets did fatigue finally make an appearance. Since I had his number, it was up to me to make the next move.
As his words played in my mind before I fell asleep—“Never hold yourself back. If you want to say something or do something to me, then do it”—I reminded myself he’d given me the green light. I just needed to put my foot on the gas.
12
Stellan
“What are you doing tonight?” Baylor asked from where he sat on the stool in my garage.
He’d brought his car over for me to change his brake pads, rotors, and oil. I’d started doing that for him after he asked my opinion about a bill he’d received when he’d taken his vehicle in to a different body shop and something as simple as getting new spark plugs turned into them trying to get him to buy a new transmission. He could’ve easily taken it to Baker’s, but since I enjoyed tinkering with cars, and it gave us time to catch up outside of rehearsals, I didn’t mind it.
“Probably my typical Sunday night special: pizza, beer, and Netflix. You?”
“I’m having dinner with Julianna.”
“Which one is she?” I asked because that name didn’t sound familiar.
Baylor was a serial monogamist. He loved the idea of love and had his heart broken just as much as he dated.