anything to do with you. There will be no business that’ll welcome you, no old friends that will be happy to see you. You’re a man who needs the world to love him, people to dance to his tune, a three-ring circus to surround him with attention. You won’t find it here.”
“You son of a bitch,” Rex said, his eyes darkening with anger.
“It takes one to know one,” Mike said, placing his still-full glass on the desk with a loud thunk.
As he walked out, he realized he felt nothing for the man glaring at him from across the room except pity and contempt.
Off duty and alone, Cara was surprised to find herself standing outside her mother’s apartment. She’d sat across the way, watching the entrance, waiting for her father to leave. There was an off-track betting site located farther downtown, and Cara knew the old man liked to hang out there. Along with his other out-of-work friends, he could be counted on to spend a good couple of hours there. Cara banked on it as she sneaked into the side entrance of the apartment building and walked up the stairs to see her mother.
A long time had passed since Cara felt the need for her mother. She was surprised she felt it now. But Cara hadn’t seen or heard from Mike since work on Monday. He hadn’t called her. He hadn’t stopped by. And he hadn’t been in to the station, at least not when she’d been there. She felt his absence in the deepest places inside her, and it hurt.
Along with the emptiness came the desire to talk to her mom. To feel her arms around her and get her advice—no matter how Cara felt about Natalie Hartley’s choices, she was her mother. And Cara needed her more than ever.
Cara wasn’t disappointed. Her mother greeted her with a surprised cry and open arms.
“I waited until Dad left. Nobody saw me come in,” Cara said.
Her mother nodded. “He should be gone for a while.”
“Good.”
“Come sit.” Her mother grasped Cara’s hand and led her to the same sofa that had been here when Cara was a child, a blue velvet, with faded marks and worn patches.
Much like Natalie, who had once been a beautiful woman, with dark hair like Cara’s, and blue eyes, vibrant and full of life, until her husband had beaten her down.
And there was nothing Cara could have done to prevent it. “I’m sorry,” Cara whispered. “For not visiting, for cutting you out of my life.”
Her mother nodded through tears. “Don’t be silly. You have every right to be disappointed in me.”
“Not disappointed, exactly. I just wanted you to leave him.”
“Oh, honey.” Her mother smoothed her hand down Cara’s hair, just as she used to do when Cara was a child. “I can’t go anywhere. I chose my life. He’d just find me and make things more difficult after. I’m used to how things are. And it’s not that bad most of the time.”
Cara couldn’t meet her mother’s gaze and pretend her words were okay. Life was supposed to be so much more than not that bad most of the time, she thought, as her tears leaked down her cheeks.
Her mother handed her a tissue from a box on the side table, and they both wiped their eyes.
“Don’t cry for me,” her mother said. “Just don’t make the same mistakes.”
Cara opened her mouth to speak, but her mom shook her head. “No. I need to say this. My mistake was in not trusting my gut from the beginning. For going back each time your father promised to never yell or hit me again.”
This was the first time Natalie had ever spoken about her life, and Cara listened, wide-eyed and stunned, as her mother admitted things they’d only hidden or pretended didn’t exist before.
Her mother sighed. “I wanted so badly to believe him that I closed my eyes to the truth because it would have been so much harder to leave and start over, alone with a child.” Her mother’s shoulders shook, her eyes damp, but she held Cara’s gaze.
“Mom—”
“No, honey. Keep listening. If this is the only chance I get to tell you this, you need to hear me. When you meet a man, don’t listen to what he says. Judge him by his actions, past and present. People can change, but they have to prove it to you. Words are just that.” Her mother leaned in and kissed Cara’s cheek.
“Oh, Mom. There is a man,” Cara said