it would have been as useless as the first time. Gran had done something he would never, could never repay her for, and now he never would. But the nights when Gran had tucked him up in the little room next to hers had made every one of the eight long years he had suffered through worth it.
And he knew that made him a bad person, a selfish person. She had been his rock. Lit the house with lamps everywhere. Not one single dark corner to be left in, to be locked in, to be—
“Here we go.” Jensen opened the door on a cozy room. Dash’s eyes immediately flew to the bedside lamp, and he breathed a sigh of relief. “It’s a little small, and there’s only a shower, no closet I’m afraid, but there’s a bath in the other bathroom when you want a soak.” Dash’s breath caught. The image of Jensen lying up to his chin in bubbles caught him off guard.
“Spare towels, toothbrush, everything you need under the sink.” Jensen nodded to the bathroom. He opened the old freestanding wardrobe, and it creaked. “I thought there would be some extra blankets, but there might be in the other room.” Jensen shut it with a grimace when it creaked again, but Dash had seen it was empty. “Would you like some hot chocolate?”
Dash blushed. He would, but Jensen had gone to enough trouble. Jensen smiled almost as if Dash had answered the question. “Take your time. I have to make some calls, but I’ll bring you some up.”
Dash opened his mouth to thank him, but Jensen had disappeared before he could get his brain to make his mouth work. It was always the same. Every time he needed to say something, his throat constricted until the words were too big to get through such a small space. It was easier to keep silent. It had always been easier to keep silent.
Dash quickly got himself undressed and into the shower. Washing himself had always been methodical, hurried. He’d never known how long he would get, so speed was of the essence. If Steven had been in a really bad mood, the lights would go off while he was still wet. His breath hitched and he trembled slightly even though the water was warm.
After another minute, he got out and made short work of getting dry. He let himself out of the tiny bathroom cautiously, still wrapped in the towel, but the room was empty. Dash glanced at the bed and froze. A pair of pajamas—his pajamas—were laid on the bed along with a fluffy pair of socks, and his bear, Tuppence.
He knew Tuppence was a ridiculous name, but Gran had been a fan of old English movies, and that name had come straight out of a Mary Poppins song. The version she had loved was even on an old video cassette that she’d sworn she was going to get made into a DVD but never had.
It was too late now.
Dash heard the measured footsteps climbing the stairs and hurried into his pj’s. He was diving under the covers when he got his second shock of the day.
A hot-water bottle.
Jensen came in after knocking lightly and saw Dash pulling the blankets up. “There isn’t an electric blanket on this bed, and Mimi loved hot-water bottles,” Jensen said apologetically.
Dash was charmed. “Thank you.” He sat up as Jensen put the mug on the nightstand beside him.
“Do you have a phone?”
Dash nodded. It had two days of contract left before it would be cut off.
“Where?”
Dash hesitated and his heart picked up. Dash’s hands curled instinctively, and he immediately stared at the nightstand where he’d put it. Was this some sort of test? Steven hadn’t allowed him one at all. Jensen followed Dash’s glance toward his phone and he smiled, walking over and picking it up. When he turned it on, he would immediately see the password notification, but he didn’t even look, just held it out to Dash. Then he got his own out of his pocket. “What’s your number?”
Dash was too startled to even hesitate, and he rattled it off. In another second he felt it vibrate and glanced at the screen.
“There, you have my number. I’d get some sleep if I were you, but please call me or even just yell if you need me. My room is the other one exactly opposite you, and I’m a light sleeper.” He paused, then took a couple of steps closer to him.