No Love Lost (Masters & Mercenaries The Forgotten #5) - Lexi Blake Page 0,156

missing a piece of myself.”

He kissed her again, his tongue going deep, sliding against hers and bringing her right back to aroused as hell, though this time it was tinged with deep emotion. There had been something so good about telling him how she’d felt all these years.

She could feel his cock, long and hard against her belly.

What did she owe to herself?

Did she owe herself one last chance at happiness? Should she simply take every chance she had, never giving up on finding what she needed? Never shutting herself off?

Never giving in and truly becoming the Solo she’d been on track to be when she’d found Beck. The Solo who needed no one, cared for nothing but her own ambition. She’d joined the Agency because she’d wanted the cold precision it offered, wanted to numb herself out, and hadn’t it been irony that she’d found the one man who could tear down all her walls.

Did she really want to live behind walls for the rest of her life?

She let her arms wrap around him and she surrendered to the inevitable. She loved him. She didn’t want to stop loving him. Maybe if she could have stayed away from him… No, if he hadn’t come back into her life, she’d been ready to live it strictly for Roman. She hadn’t even wanted another man, hadn’t wanted this connection with anyone but Beck.

But she owed herself more. If she was going to try, she was going to do it her way. “I’m not living here in Dallas. There’s some place else I want to be.”

He backed her up against the wall, right next to the cross where he’d bound her, trying to force her to break.

Because sometimes a person had to break down to build back up again. To be stronger. To want more.

“Anywhere,” he vowed. “I’ll go anywhere with you.”

She felt the wall against her back as he pressed her there. He positioned her so his cock was rubbing against her clit, and she was so aware he wasn’t wearing that piece of latex that he usually would. “You can’t work for McKay-Taggart if you’re not in one of their cities.”

He pulled her leg up, urging her to wind herself around him. “I’ll get another job. Or I’ll become a stay-at-home dad. I don’t care. My job will be loving you, building a future with you. I love you so much.”

She couldn’t say it back. “I don’t know if I can ever fully love you again.”

“I’ll make you believe. I’ll make you believe in me again, in us. All I need is a chance. Give us a chance. I won’t let you down this time.” He winced and started to pull away. “I’ve got to…”

She lightly dug her nails in, holding him tight. “I want more kids. I want Roman to have a brother or a sister.”

If she was in, she was going all in. She wanted everything they should have had the first time. She waited for him to argue with her, to tell her they needed time to adjust. It was what the old Beck would have done. It was precisely why they hadn’t had a kid back then. She’d wanted to step back from work, and he’d wanted to give it a little time.

She’d learned time was the one thing she couldn’t get back.

“I know I should argue, but I won’t ever make you wait again,” he promised. “Hold on to me.”

She wrapped her arms around him and gasped as he entered her in one powerful thrust.

The little pains in her nipples and on her ass were incidental now. All that mattered was how good it was to have Beck inside her once again.

She would try. She would give them another chance. If he would really let her decide where they lived, where they worked, then he’d changed.

“You can’t leave me again,” she said as the pleasure started to build inside her.

“Never. We’ll fight it out. No matter what, we’ll stay together,” he promised and then he kissed her again, letting his mouth take hers, drinking down the shout that came as she went over the edge.

He ground out his own orgasm and held her tight.

They were still for a moment. She breathed him in.

“I’m still mad at you,” she said quietly. “But I’m not going anywhere.”

He nuzzled her neck. “I’ll take it because I am so in love with you.”

She kissed him, content with her choice. They would see where they went from here.

Chapter Eighteen

Beck looked