My Year of Saying No - Maxine Morrey Page 0,38

reassurance. It was so brief I wasn’t sure if I imagined it, but there was a fizzing in my body that gave me a clue I hadn’t. ‘You weren’t to know.’

‘I know. But still. I forget not everyone is as lucky as me when it comes to the parental lottery.’

He flicked his gaze across briefly, before focussing back on the road. ‘Don’t ever feel you need to apologise or feel guilty for having a good relationship with your family.’

I nodded, not quite able to shake the feeling I’d put my foot in it. ‘So, how do you know him? Did you serve together?’

‘No. He’s a bit older than me and we were in different units, but we did run into each other on deployments a couple of times. His skill with mechanics was kind of legendary throughout the base. Everyone took him stuff to be repaired and we chatted in passing a few times when he fixed some things for me, but that was kind of it.’

‘Is he still in the Army?’

Seb shook his head. ‘No. After three tours, he was done.’

‘I can understand that. I mean, as well as anyone who’s never been in that situation can.’

He gave me a soft smile. ‘I know what you mean. And the fact that you try and understand these things is yet another of your great qualities.’

I wasn’t sure what to say so I just smiled in response, but his eyes were on the road and I couldn’t have said whether he saw or not.

‘Readjustment to civilian life is an odd thing. Some people find it a hell of a lot easier than others.’

‘I get the feeling Angus wasn’t one of those people who found it easy then?’

‘No. He’d enlisted as soon as he was able, in order to leave behind the life he had, and he made a new life, a new family if you like, in the Army. It suited him and gave him the structure that his early home life hadn’t. He’d found his place in the world and knew where he belonged and who he was. But tours, and war, take their toll. Leaving wasn’t an easy decision for him, but it seemed the right one. He had a wife and daughter to come home to, the stability of a loving home.’

I let out a sigh. ‘But I have a horrible feeling it didn’t go to plan?’

‘No. Angus found it hard to adjust. Life outside can be completely different. He struggled with the lack of discipline he saw around him, and the lack of respect that people seem to have for one another a lot of the time now. He got a job in a garage and, for a while, that went well. He’d found a place again, doing something he was good at. And then the owner retired and handed the reins over to his son. He had dramatically different ideas for what he wanted the business to be. It was a successful operation, but this new bloke wasn’t happy servicing the customers that had been coming to them for years with their little old Ford Fiestas and people carriers. He had this idea that they were going to be luxury car specialists – Fords were out, Ferraris were in. Angus is pretty easy-going and appreciates any sort of good engineering, but this guy’s attitude rattled him from the start. I think the bloke knew that Angus could run rings around him and that rankled. He managed to get everyone’s back up and was always questioning their work and treating them… well, I guess we’re back to that disrespect thing again. Here are these guys who’ve been doing a job for thirty-odd years and in comes this upstart, for want of a better word, telling them how to suck eggs.’

‘I can’t imagine it went down well.’

‘No. Not exactly. Pretty soon people started leaving. People Angus had built up a bond with.’

‘That can’t have been easy for him.’

‘No. He’d left one work family and been lucky to find another, helping him make what had begun as a difficult transition a lot easier. And then it all began to fall apart again. He looked around for other work, but the recession wasn’t helping things and although he tried to keep his head down, the new boss didn’t like him. I think he was intimidated by him, if I’m honest. I know the guy’s dad stood up for Angus, but it was this bloke’s business now and there wasn’t much