my cup in my grip instead. “Please know I would never hurt you. And if it’s what you want, what you need, I promise we’ll keep things between us strictly professional.”
Jamie nodded and blew out a slow quiet exhale as whatever determination had held him up ebbed away. He sagged a little, his frame becoming smaller as he finished quietly unpacking into his workspace.
The rest of the day passed in an uneasy, strained silence, broken only by occasional questions or requests for files from one or the other of us.
At around midday, he stood. “I’m going to grab lunch from the deli.”
“Okay.” I remained focused on my paperwork.
Well, I hoped I looked focused on my paperwork, anyway. In truth, I hadn’t thought about a single thing but Jamie since he walked in the door earlier. Since Saturday night, really.
Before that, if I was honest with myself.
“Take as long as you need.” I sounded dismissive and cool. Professional, hopefully.
Then I watched Jamie’s back as he walked through the door, and I studied his profile as he walked away, past the glass walls of my office, like he might look back, give me some encouragement, or something. But he didn’t so much as glance my way.
Perhaps he’d been right. Maybe he needed another mentor. My office suddenly seemed too small for both us, like he was taking up all the space.
I shook my head. At least he wasn’t here now. Maybe I’d get some work done.
And I did. For the next ninety minutes, I threw myself into a pile of paperwork and achieved more than I had in the past two weeks. Apparently, I just required the need for a distraction from my actual life to progress at work. Who knew? It didn’t stop my wondering when Jamie would be back, or even if he’d already approached Saint to mentor under someone else.
Saint himself would be the best choice for that, with a lot of divorce law butting right up against aspects of family law. But I’d be sorry if Jamie had to focus away from his interests and the more nuanced and varied cases we handled together each day.
Still, I shrugged off the thought that he might have gone to see his brother. I’d told him to take as long as he needed at lunch. Maybe that was all he was doing. But the buzz of adrenaline as I wondered where he was fueled me as I continued my work.
“I brought you this.”
I looked up at Jamie’s announcement, and nodded as he put my favorite coffee on the desk in front of me. The warm, hazelnut aroma blended with that of his familiar cologne, and I inhaled deeply as I took a small sip.
The action was as much to genuinely have a drink as to buy myself some time to compose myself at Jamie’s reappearance in my office. I almost hadn’t expected him to come back.
“Thank you.”
He nodded in response to my simple words, and my heart contracted at the impersonal gesture of acknowledgment. Something about his attitude made it cool and unfeeling. Perhaps he’d been right, and we needed to talk to Saint about removing him from my service. But that thought hurt more than Jamie’s current behavior.
I’d meant everything I said to Jamie—I wouldn’t act on my attraction, but I didn’t feel like I could ignore it was there.
Something would have to give, but fresh determination rose that it wouldn’t be what I felt for Jamie.
I took another sip of the coffee he’d bought for me and watched him over the rim as he typed on his laptop, pausing every now and again to refer to the case notes to his right. I could only see him in profile, but I wanted to cup his cheek and tangle my fingers in his blond hair as I kissed that beautiful mouth.
I stood and stared out of the office window again. I’d never spent as much time looking at this view as I had in the past couple of weeks. Apparently, it was the only way to bring my thoughts back into order. And thoughts were all I had, with so little conversation from Jamie.
I needed to talk to Saint. We couldn’t go on like this. But I’d have to save it for the end of the week. Saint had a big case coming up, and he also had his own intern to manage and teach. He didn’t need the distraction of me talking to him before they’d dealt with the