Million Dollar Christmas Bride - Holly Rayner Page 0,43

He tried a different tactic. “They’re separate issues entirely.”

“Great,” she said. “Then let’s keep business apart from our personal lives. I think we should have some space for a while.”

He watched her set the coffee mug down on a side table near the front door. She hitched her purse up on her shoulder.

“We’ve been spending so much time together,” she said. “I think I was starting to lose sight of the big picture. But in reality, I’m just an employee to you.”

“You’re not an employee,” he said.

“Oh really? You’re paying me to fulfill a role for you, so you can get what you want. That’s pretty much the definition of employee, Jackson.”

“But you’re more than that,” he said. “You’re…” He wasn’t sure how to put what he felt into words. She had become a friend, over the past few weeks. He was addicted to seeing her, or at the very least talking to her, every single day. When he saw her, he felt happier. And when she wasn’t around, he was thinking of her.

And then there was the attraction he felt. How could he explain that?

She waited, frozen.

He wanted to tell her how he felt, but he was afraid. He’d seen the pain that love could cause. I can’t love her, he thought. I can’t.

“You’re my friend,” he said lamely.

She narrowed her eyes and shook her head slightly. “Friend with benefits?” she said coolly. “No, thanks. You can find another ‘friend’ to share your bed with. And you know what? You can take care of the remainder of the wedding planning on your own. Our contract doesn’t state that I have any obligation to help you with that. I’ll be there on Christmas Day to play my part in front of your mom. Text me if you need to get a message to me, but please don’t call.” Her voice sounded so tight, so strained.

“Please, Bianca,” Jackson said, as she reached for the door. “Please, wait a minute. Wait.”

It was too late. She stepped through the door, Peaches at her side.

Rufus gave a bark of disappointment as the two disappeared behind the closed door.

Jackson felt the pressure of Rufus’s paw at his hip. The dog was well trained and barely ever jumped up, so it took Jackson by surprise, “Down, buddy,” he said, as he gripped one tan paw and then guided it downward.

Rufus whined.

“I’ll take you out in a minute,” Jackson said.

Rufus whined again, as if to make it clear that it wasn’t a morning potty break that he was interested in.

Jackson shook his head. “I’m not going to go after them, buddy,” he said. “What would I say? She wants more from me than I’m capable of giving.”

He turned and expected Rufus to follow him back into the apartment. When he reached the hallway, though, he sensed that Rufus wasn’t by his side. He looked back and saw him at the door, with his paws up.

“Leave it,” Jackson said. It was a command he’d trained Rufus to obey as a pup. Back then, Rufus had a habit of sticking his nose where it didn’t belong—bits of trash on the sidewalk, unidentifiable mounds of who-knew-what in the parks. It had taken a while for Rufus to get the hang of the command, but once he’d finally learned it, it worked like a charm. When Jackson uttered those two simple words, Rufus would switch his focus away from the off-limits object and instead trot right to Jackson’s side.

For the first time in many years, the command didn’t work.

Rufus continued to stand at the door, his big paws propped against it, his nose almost in line with the peephole.

Jackson backtracked and walked to Rufus’s side. He placed a hand on the dog’s back and stroked his fur. “I said leave it.”

Rufus looked up at him, and his eyes conveyed a message that Jackson didn’t want to accept: You just made a big mistake.

In his heart, Jackson knew that his dog was right. Letting Bianca leave felt so wrong.

But she pretty much demanded to hear words that I’m not ready to say, he thought. I can’t say “I love you.”

A response to this thought surfaced in his mind, from deep within his soul. It was a question he’d struggled with for years but had never found an answer for.

Will I ever feel ready to say those three words?

Chapter 15

Jackson

Jackson walked back into the sitting area and eyed the couch. Just last night, Bianca had been sitting there in the corner, looking so