perspective. As though Bella had no will of her own. Surely, she’d been the one to choose, hadn’t she? If she had ever asked me to leave her alone, I would have turned around and walked the other way. But she’d wanted me to stay, then and now.
My thoughts drifted back to check in on the Spanish classroom, and they naturally tuned in to the most familiar voice, but my mind was tangled around Bella as usual, so for a moment I didn’t realize what I was hearing.
And then my teeth clamped together so hard that even the humans near me heard. One boy looked around for the source of the cracking sound.
Oops, Emmett thought.
I curled my hands into fists and concentrated on staying in my seat.
Sorry, I was trying not to think about that.
I glanced at the clock. Fifteen minutes before I could punch him in the face.
I didn’t mean any harm. Hey, I took your side, right? Honestly, Jasper and Rose are just being silly, betting against Alice. It’s the easiest wager I’ll ever win.
A wager about this weekend, whether Bella would live or die.
Fourteen and a half minutes.
Emmett squirmed in his seat, well aware what my total motionlessness indicated.
C’mon, Ed. You know it wasn’t serious. Anyway, it’s not even about the girl. You know better than I do whatever’s going on with Rose. Something between you two, I guess. She’s still mad, and she wouldn’t admit for all the world that she’s actually rooting for you.
He always gave Rosalie the benefit of the doubt, and though I knew that I was just the opposite—I never gave her the benefit of the doubt—I didn’t think he was right this time. Rosalie would be pleased to see me fail in this. She would be happy to see Bella’s poor choices receive what she considered their just reward. And then she’d still be jealous as Bella’s soul escaped to whatever waited beyond.
And Jazz—well, you know. He’s tired of being the weakest link. You’re kind of too perfect with the self-control, and it gets annoying. Carlisle’s different. Admit it, you’re a little… smug.
Thirteen minutes.
For Emmett and Jasper, this was just some sticky pit of quicksand I’d created for myself. Fail or succeed—to them, in the end it was nothing more than another anecdote about me. Bella wasn’t part of the equation. Her life was only a marker in the bet they’d made.
Don’t take it personally.
There was another way? Twelve and a half minutes.
You want me to back out of it? I will.
I sighed, and let the rigidity of my pose relax.
What was the point of stoking my anger? Should I blame them for their inability to understand? How could they?
How meaningless it all was. Infuriating, yes, but… would I have been any different if it hadn’t been my life that had changed? If it hadn’t been about Bella?
Regardless, I didn’t have time to fight with Emmett now. I would be waiting for Bella when she was done with Gym. So many more pieces to the puzzle I needed to discover.
I heard Emmett’s relief as I darted out the door at the first sound of the bell, ignoring him.
When Bella walked through the gymnasium door and saw me, a smile spread across her face. I felt the same relief I had in the car this morning. All my doubts and torments seemed to lift from my shoulders. I knew that they were still very real, but the weight was so much easier to carry when I could see her.
“Tell me about your home,” I said as we walked to the car. “What do you miss?”
“Um… my house? Or Phoenix? Or do you mean here?”
“All of those.”
She looked at me questioningly—was I serious?
“Please?” I asked as I held her door for her.
She raised one eyebrow as she climbed in, still doubting.
But when I was inside and we were alone again, she seemed to relax.
“Have you never been to Phoenix?”
I smiled. “No.”
“Right,” she said. “Of course. The sun.” She speculated about that silently for a moment. “It creates some kind of a problem for you…?”
“Indeed.” I wasn’t about to try to explain that answer. It was really something that had to be seen to be understood. Also, Phoenix was a little too close for comfort to the lands the aggressive Southern clans claimed, but that wasn’t a story I wanted to get into, either.
She waited, wondering if I would elaborate.
“So tell me about this place I’ve never seen,” I prompted.
She considered for a moment.