Madness of the Horde King - Zoey Draven Page 0,142
he was gone from this world, it would have destroyed me. Now, I finally understood the magnitude of the fear and fury Davik had felt when he’d seen me under the Dead Mountain. “Gods, Davik. Why?”
“Because I love you, Vienne,” he rasped, as if it wasn’t obvious to me already. His hands were shaking when he took my face in them, holding me still. “I would have done anything to help you. Your family…they need you. I watched your mother cry over you for days. I thought that as long as you had them—”
“I need you,” I cried. I was so grateful that it hadn’t worked, that maybe the heartstone’s power was depleted or needed significant time to recharge. “Let’s make a deal, Davik.”
I cupped his hand, which was on my cheek.
“When I am stronger again, let’s return the heartstone to the ancient groves,” I said, my voice trembling. “We are the only ones alive that know where it is. Let’s keep it that way.”
“There are those that know of its existence now, leikavi. Rath Kitala. His darukkars. My darukkars. We cannot keep the heartstone a secret any longer. Word will reach the Dothikkar eventually.”
“I don’t believe that,” I murmured. “I think Rath Kitala saw how dangerous it was. I don’t believe your hordesmen would betray you, just as I don’t believe Rath Kitala’s would either.”
Davik took in a deep breath, thinking over my words.
“Let’s return it to the tree,” I whispered. “And never speak of it again. We will never tell a soul about it, just as you’d always intended. Let’s make it lost again.”
His red eyes glowed in the darkness.
He inclined his head.
“Lysi. When you are stronger, we will go.”
Relief threaded through me. My eyes couldn’t help but stray towards the chest where I believed he’d hidden it again.
He turned me so I looked at him. He must’ve seen something in my expression because he rasped, “What is it, leikavi?”
“I’m alive,” I whispered.
His gaze shuddered. “Kakkari spared you though you used her power. I feared that she would ask a price.”
“She did,” I told him quietly, saying the words that had been building up since I’d woken. Davik had been the first I’d thought of telling. Because he would understand. Even my family wouldn’t understand like he would.
His brow furrowed. “Neffar?”
“My gift is gone,” I said. His pupils dilated, his frown deepening. “That was Kakkari’s price. That is why I’m still alive.”
“Completely?” he rasped.
I nodded.
“Leikavi…”
“I don’t know how to be without it, Davik. My gift was like a flame. Once it was sparked when I was young, it continued to grow more and more powerful until it burned bright and raged inside me,” I whispered.
I’d always felt it evolving over the years. But the last month…that had been its most powerful.
Perhaps for a reason, I realized suddenly. Perhaps because I was meant to help those under the Dead Mountain. Maybe Kakkari had always meant for me to use her heartstone. Maybe everything had worked out as it was meant to.
Like…like my fate had already been written.
“Now it’s been extinguished. It’s empty inside me, I can feel it. And I don’t know if it will spark again or if it’s gone forever…but either way,” I whispered, looking at him, giving him a soft, wobbly smile, “I’m all right with this. You cannot receive something without giving something in return. There has to be balance. Lokkaru’s father understood that. And he paid a much steeper price than I had to, so I am grateful that this was all Kakkari asked of me. Because it means I get to be with you. With my family.”
I had wielded the ultimate power and then all my power had left me. A balancing to the universe. It had been necessary. It had been inevitable.
Something settled within me.
It was acceptance.
There were things beyond us all, things we would never understand, and this was one of them.
Davik was still frowning at me, concerned, but I gave him a smile, which softened his severe features.
“Everything worked out the way it was meant to,” I told him, pressing my hands to his chest, cuddling into his warmth. He made me feel safe and protected. He made me feel cherished. “Now, I’m excited to look forward, not back.”
The past would forever remain unchanged. In all of its ugliness, in all of its sweetness, it did not matter. But this was now.
Things were changing and shifting. They always would. And I wanted to be at Davik’s side as they did.