too hard, trying to get free. I looked at the marks on my wrists. They made me want him more, not less.
“He hasn’t hurt me. He… We’re…”
I heard my aunt’s intake of breath. “Oh no. You didn’t?”
Whatever she was thinking, I’d done much worse. “I’m not giving you details.”
“Ugh. I don’t want details about that.”
I shuddered. I loved Cathy, and we were close, but I wasn’t about to start giving her details about my sex life. “I meant about what Leo is involved in.”
“How do I know you’re okay if you can’t leave his place? How do I know he’s not going to, like, carve you up and make trophies from your body parts?”
“Oh my God. What the hell? I’m not in danger from Leo.”
“But you are in danger?”
“From someone Leo is… investigating.”
“Wait. Is he undercover or something? He’s been running that shop for almost two years. Was he investigating a mob operation?”
I pressed my lips together to keep from laughing.
“No, but I really can’t tell you more. Leo is a good guy, though. You have to believe me on that.”
“You’re in too deep with him.” I heard the exasperation in her voice.
Again, it was hard not to laugh even though there wasn’t anything funny about the fact that even if Leo and I were both fine physically, when his mission ended, he was going to break my fucking heart. “You warned me. You did all you could.”
She sighed. “You’ve had a thing for him since the first time you saw him, and I can’t blame you.
“Cathy, he’s even more amazing than I’d dreamed.”
“Oh shit. It’s worse than I thought. You’re in love with him.”
“Maybe. I…” It would be better to try to convince myself I wasn’t.
“So this is just a temporary thing for him?”
I thought about what he’d said to me about wanting to take care of me always. He claimed I was his, but that was all just a game, right? Sexual role play? “I think so.”
“But that’s not what you want.”
There was no point in denying it. She already knew. “No.”
“Have you told him?”
I made a strangled noise. “What?”
“Have you told him how you feel?”
“No. I mean, I think he suspects. I almost said something when—”
“Nope. I don’t need those details.”
Heat rose in my cheeks. “I wasn’t going to say anything TMI.”
She sighed. “I suppose that means you’re no longer worried if you’ll ever find the right man.
“No. I found him.”
“Then tell him.”
“He doesn’t want to hear it. He thinks… he thinks he’s not right for me, that he’s not caring enough, too old, too dangerous. He’s wrong.”
“You’re sure about that?”
I considered the question as I heard Leo’s raised voice. I couldn’t make out his words, but I knew he was angry. I wanted to go to him and soothe him. “I’m more sure than I’ve been about anything in a long time.” My chest felt tight as I said the words. I was in love with him. I couldn’t deny it, at least not to myself.
“Then go after what you want.”
Was she serious? “You told me to stay away from him.”
“I thought that was the safest thing. You ignored that advice, and maybe, just maybe, you and Leo were meant to be. But if you don’t talk to him, you’ll never know.”
“But he said—”
“Is he trying to protect you, or does he really not want more?”
“I don’t know.” Earlier that night I’d been convinced he didn’t want what I did. Now I wondered if he just didn’t think he deserved it. “I’ll think about it.”
“Ezra, you left school because it wasn’t what you wanted, because you wanted to choose your own life instead of doing what everyone expected. Now it’s time to actually do that.”
Maybe it was, but Leo needed to focus on his mission. After he’d dealt with Swain, I would see if I had the courage to ask for more.
22
Leo
When X answered the video call I’d placed, everyone was already gathered in his office.
“What are you going to do about the fundraiser?” Giorgio asked.
“I told my assistant to extend an invite to Swain.”
Niall frowned. “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”
“I want him out in the open. I want all of you there as well.”
“We’ve always stayed away from anything that happens at your house,” I insisted.
“This is too important. I’d rather risk my identity than not nail this bastard.”
We had other ways of getting to Swain. “If you’re exposed, and you can’t continue with Vigilance—”
“I will continue. I’ll find a way.”
With anyone else