grew wider. “You truly are a lovely boy, my Eros. The very best of me, I think.”
I’d never hated being referred to as her son, because it was the truth, but in this moment, I had a terrible urge to do something violent to her. Something awful and wicked. I swallowed hard. Gods, what was wrong with me?
“You do not find her pretty, do you, my boy?”
“No,” I said instantly, holding my chin high. Giving mother a pompous look of indifference.
I did not find Psyche pretty. Pretty implied she was simply just okay. Nice enough. She was more.
She was becoming everything to me. A terrifying and foreign need was rising up in me. I wanted to guard her. Protect her. I wanted to be hers. Her man. Her lover. Her world. I wanted her to want me as I desperately yearned for her. And not merely because of the skin she wore. But because I knew she would understand me like no other being in the world could. And I would know her just as well.
“Good,” mother said, blue eyes sparkling. I knew that look. It was mischief that rose in her now.
“That is good. Because this bores me. There will be a festival. Held in my honor.”
I frowned. “What?”
“Yes. These islanders have been neglected far too long by me. An oversight I aim to rectify. You will lead the charge, of course. Lay out the banners, tell all of them that they are to bring their youngest daughters to be judged, by me. The family of my chosen will receive unimaginable wealth and fame.”
This was too good. Far too good a bargain for my mother. I cocked my head. “What’s the catch, mother?”
Her laughter was an intoxicating sound to most. But to me, I had to fight to keep from grinding my molars together and calling her an evil bitch.
“Well, my dear boy, you know your mother well. My champion will be betrothed to a male of my choosing, of course. And I guarantee that she will adore him because your arrow will pierce her heart.”
My heart raced with the force of a stampeding stallion. She would force me to strip Psyche of her autonomy and fall in love with a nightmare. I just knew it. I knew already what this really was.
“Mother, those arrows are danger—”
“Do you dare defy me, boy!” She straightened her shoulders, glaring angrily at me. My mind raced, thinking up so many different methods to stop her. Thousands of ideas flooded my mind, but in order to accomplish any of them I’d need her to truly believe me still on her side. If she sensed, for even a moment, that I was not one hundred percent her mindless lackey she would be on guard and I would never be able to save Psyche from a fate worse than death.
“Of course not,” I said without heart, without inflection, without emotion.
She peered at me a moment, before finally smirking and nodding. “Good. Now hug me, my boy. Our fights are ever so draining.”
She held out her arms.
Violence rose up in me. The violence of my father. I reveled in the dark and grotesque images of what I wished to do to her for only a moment, just a second, and then I buried it. Deep. Far down deep. And I cloaked myself in numbness. I hugged her. Laying my head upon her left breast, she did not hug me back. She never did. This was how she’d controlled me my whole life, giving me what I wanted. Love and affection, while still holding it all back.
I’d been so desperate for anyone to hold me, to love me, that this had once been enough. But it wasn’t any longer and hadn’t been for a very long time.
I kissed her cheek, then I stepped back. Meek and mild mannered once more.
“Set out the banners tomorrow.” Then she wiggled her fingers and I felt a transforming light fall upon me.
When I looked down, I saw a soft paunch where none had been before. And my skin had darkened to a deep olive. I rubbed my head, there was no hair there.
“Until this is done, enjoy your new looks. In case you had any ideas of visiting the girl, she would not want you like this.”
Mother smirked. So bloody sure of herself.
I nodded. “Yes, mother.”
“I will return in three days’ time. I expect the festival to be up to my standard, boy.”
Then she was gone.
I turned, heading for the doorway