Kansas (Ruthless Kings MC Atlantic City #2) - K.L. Savage Page 0,76

been there. I should have saved you.” I lift my hand and rub the one spot on her jaw that’s not harmed by a bruise or a cut. “I am so sorry, Springs.”

She doesn’t reply. She’s just as still as she was when I walked inside the room.

“You’re so beautiful,” I continue to talk to her. “You aren’t alone, okay? I’m here every step of the way. You won’t ever be alone again.”

Her heart rate changes, and I glance up at the monitor, then to her face to see if she’s waking up, but it’s becoming slower, so slow the monitors start wailing, blinking red.

I fly out of my chair just as a team of doctors rush in, along with Pulse. I grip the thick of my hair and give them room, scared out of my damn mind. “I didn’t touch her. I didn’t do anything. What’s wrong with her? What happened!” I scream at them in the flurry of chaos. “Talk to me, goddamn it! Tell me!” The heart rate monitor flatlines, the constant low beep a sound that rips my heart right of my chest. “No, no, no. Please,” I sob and Pulse grips me by the jaws and gives me a shake. “Why is this happening?”

“She has a pneumothorax. It can happen after surgery. Basically, she has an air bubble and it’s traveling. We need to release the air.”

“Fucking release it then!” I roar.

“They are going to needle aspirate. They will put a needle into her chest cavity, watch.” He steps out of the way and points to the doctor that has the needle in his hand. “You see that?”

The doctor shoves a needle into her, causing me to flinch because I want to swoop in a save her myself. I know they are helping, but it almost looks like they are hurting her.

“Now he will pull back on the syringe,” Pulse says.

The doctor does what he says, and the syringe is empty as he pulls back, hopefully, full of air. The monitor begins to beep again, and I bend over, pressing my hands against my knees, and let out a breath I didn’t realize I was holding.

“There we go,” the doctor states, staring at the needle before lying it on the tray next to him. “She’s stable.”

Pulse pats the middle of my back, and I shake my head. I should be more put together than this. While she isn’t dead, I know what Wolf feels like now. I can’t imagine how I’d be if she died. I’d be just like him. I’m already out of my mind.

“She’s going to be okay,” Pulse says. “I know it’s scary, and as I said, it’s not as scary as it looks. I’m not saying her condition isn’t serious, it is, but so far, nothing has happened that we don’t have control of, okay? The first twenty-four hours are the worst. After that, it’s hopeful she’ll make it through without any other complications.”

“Pulse, it’s like I can’t breathe,” I gasp. “Why can’t I be in more control?” I struggle to breathe again and press my hand against my heart. “My chest hurts.” I inhale again, but it’s like my throat is closing up or my lungs won’t accept the air.

He pushes me into the chair as I stare at him with wide eyes.

“What’s… happening…”

“You’re having a panic attack,” he says, pushing me into the seat. “You have to slow your breathing. Come on, follow my breaths.”

“I can’t. I can’t!” I squeeze my eyes shut as my head swims in uncertainty and lack of oxygen.

He lifts his hand and slaps me across the face. The burn stings my cheek, and my jaw aches, and I don’t have time to react before he backhands me again.

I shake my head, and my vision stabilizes. I can breathe. My lungs open, and I suck air in as if I’m starved for it. Pulse checks, well, my pulse, and he nods. “There we go. Calm down, brother. You’ll be okay.”

“Thank you,” I mumble, exhausted.

“Sorry, sometimes a bit of pain brings people back to reality. I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“No, I appreciate it. I can’t believe I reacted that way. I’m better than that.”

“Kansas, no one is better than that. You have someone you love in a hospital bed fighting for her life. You witnessed her flatline. You saw a needle go into her chest. That isn’t easy. Panic is normal. There isn’t a manual to deal with an emotional disaster like this. I wish