suppose I also wanted to meet your ward and offer assistance.” That didn’t answer his question, but he didn’t think she was going to. “I should not have declined to help you before. I was angry at your father for making you deal with her.”
“I haven’t really minded.” He had at first, of course, and had even told Fiona that. Inwardly wincing, he made a mental note to apologize for that again. He’d been an enormous ass.
“Haven’t you? It sounds as if she’s a disaster—refusing to marry and struggling to fit in.”
“She fits in fine, actually. She’s become quite close with Lady Cassandra Westbrook.”
“Your ward counts the Duke of Evesham’s daughter as a friend? Is this the same chit who fell down in front of the queen?” the dowager asked incredulously.
Tobias eyed her with curiosity. “You’ve been paying attention.”
She huffed. “I receive the newspapers from town. Which is how I also know you have been misbehaving. Are you still up to your antics and evading the parson’s trap?”
“Actually, I was hoping to marry. I’ve just been…distracted.” Wholly. Irreparably. Wonderfully.
“By that troublesome ward. It’s good that I’m here. I’ll take over managing the chit, and I’ll toss her back to the countryside if I must. I can’t imagine—”
Tobias pinched the bridge of his nose. “Please stop. She’s not troublesome, and you’re not tossing her anywhere. She’s quite lovely, actually. She’s smart, charming, never fails to make me laugh, and she possesses a unique perspective that none of the other ladies in town has demonstrated.”
The dowager gaped at him. “Good heavens, Deane, you sound as though you’re in love with her.”
A queasy, giddy feeling swept over him. Yes, he was in love with her. That’s why he wanted to marry her. Not because he was desperate to shag her—though he was that too. And not because he wanted to keep Horethorne—though that was, as he’d said, an added benefit. The primary reason he wanted her for his wife—the only reason that mattered—was that he loved her. He couldn’t imagine her leaving. Just the notion of his grandmother “tossing her back to the countryside” made him want to vault out of his chair, rush to Fiona’s chamber, and beg her to stay.
Except he’d already proposed—badly, he now realized. Had she refused him because of the inadequacy of his proposal, or did she not feel the same? Was he heading straight for another Priscilla situation where he would be thrust aside, his heart broken?
He couldn’t compare Fiona to Priscilla. He’d thought he was in love two years ago, but that was nothing compared to what he felt now. Just the thought of seeing Fiona made his chest compress and then grow light with anticipation.
“I can tell from your silence that you have realized you do.” The dowager exhaled with what sounded like resignation. “What do you plan to do about it then?”
“I’m not certain yet, but we’re attending an assembly tonight. I’d invite you to come along, but you’re probably too tired.”
“I am, but I want to meet this chi—this young lady—before you go. I shall require a respite for a couple of hours. Then she will present herself to me here.”
Tobias wished he had time to prepare Fiona, but he was already late for Westminster. “I’ll inform Carrin, but now I must go.” He stood and went to take her hand, giving her a light squeeze. “Thank you for coming. I am glad to know the truth. I think perhaps I understand my father a little better.”
“I don’t see how that’s possible, but I’m pleased for you.” She smiled up at him. “You’re a good boy.”
With a soft chuckle, Tobias released her hand and left. On his way out, he told Carrin about the scheduled meeting between Fiona and his grandmother. “You may wish to ensure Miss Lancaster and Mrs. Tucket are present. Miss Wingate could use the support.” He winked at the butler before striding outside to his waiting coach.
As he leaned back against the squab and the vehicle began moving, he considered his grandmother’s question: what was he going to do about being in love with Fiona?
First and foremost, he needed to stop behaving like a self-involved ass. To do that, he had to stop thinking of himself and his predicament.
He also needed to convince her that he didn’t want to marry her because of his father’s will. And to do that, he could think of only one thing that would matter. Something that had always been a tangible reminder of