left eye might be twitching and looked in the rearview mirror to see if it was visible.
“On the bright side,” Mary went on, “at least, we won’t have to worry about little Angelina after you pass. She won’t get all mopey and weepy and depressed like most immortals do when their life mates die.” Turning toward him in her seat, she exclaimed, “Do you know, I’ve heard some even go rogue when that happens. But our little Angelina won’t. No sir, not with Juan waiting in the wings.”
“Great,” G.G. growled, his hands tightening on the steering wheel again.
“Don’t worry though, we’ll make sure she makes it to your funeral.”
“What?” he asked with disbelief. “Why the hell wouldn’t she make it to the funeral? She isn’t going to take up with Juan the minute I’m dead.”
“Well, no of course she won’t mean to. She obviously loves you. I mean she must. She did pick you over that handsome, sexy Juan Villaverde. And she would want to be respectful when you die.”
G.G. nodded with a grunt, but was thinking he could have done without his mother calling Juan handsome and sexy. Did Ildaria think he was handsome and sexy too?
“But you know how new life mates are, Joshua,” his mother added now. “Why, you’re a new life mate yourself, so I know you understand.”
“Understand what?” he snapped.
“About Angelina and Juan,” she said as if that should be obvious. “You know the minute he gets word that you’re dead he’ll shower, shave, put on his best suit, and fly straight to Angelina’s side to offer condolences and support. She’s his life mate after all.”
“She’s my life mate,” G.G. snarled, but in his mind he saw Ildaria opening the door to Juan. The man had flowers and a shit-eating grin.
“And of course, she’ll be crying because she loves you so and she’s lost you, and he’ll take her in his arms to offer comfort, and . . . Well, you know how new life mates are,” she repeated.
He did know, and the Juan of the shit-eating grin in his mind was now ravishing Ildaria up against the still open door.
“Bloody hell,” G.G. barked furiously, but his mother wasn’t done.
“It’ll be sex, pass out, sex, pass out, and so on. But we’ll be sure to stop by to collect her on the way to the funeral to ensure she isn’t passed out and missing it.”
That, he realized with dismay, was a very real possibility. Juan could be at Ildaria’s side and screwing her the day after he died if he touched her bare skin, even her hand would be enough.
“That’s only if you die suddenly of a heart attack or something,” Robert commented, his tone thoughtful. When G.G. glanced at him in the rearview mirror, hoping for something encouraging, the man pointed out, “You might end up dying of cancer or some other long drawn out disease.”
“Oh, my yes,” his mother said with realization and started nodding like a bobblehead. “In that case, Juan would probably be here in Canada, waiting for you to pass.”
“Christ,” G.G. breathed with dismay.
“I can see it now,” Mary went on in a dramatic voice. “You pale and wasted in your hospital bed, Angelina at your side . . . Juan at hers.”
“I will not have that bastard at my deathbed,” G.G. snapped. “The vulture can just wait until I die before showing up.”
Undeterred, his mother continued, “You’ll take your last, gasping breath and then pass peacefully away.” She actually made a choking sound, rolled her eyes up in her head, and then let her chin drop to her chest, imitating his death. Him. He was her one and only dear son, and she was making a mockery of his death.
Eyes popping open and head rising again, she continued, “Angelina will start to weep inconsolably, and Juan will take her in his arms to offer comfort and . . . well, you know new life mates,” she repeated pragmatically.
Yeah, he knew new life mates, G.G. thought grimly, actually visualizing the scene himself. God in heaven, they’d be screwing on top of his corpse before he was even cold in his deathbed in that scenario.
Mary heaved a sigh and said now, “I suppose I’ll just have to think of it like a donor situation.”
G.G. blinked away the nightmare of Juan and Ildaria doing it on his emaciated old-man body and asked uncertainly, “A donor situation?”
“Well, they do say the families of organ donors find comfort in the knowledge that the loss