moment ago.
I made it, I think, for one ludicrous second.
And the wooden beam cracks under his weight.
The rope goes slack in my hands.
And we both fall to the ground.
I land with a crunch, my head hitting stone, my body collapsing near the burning torch. Spots blur my vision. Nausea fills my gut.
Two sets of claws land before me.
I am laying at the beast's heels.
Broken and weak. And suddenly, I am taken back to another time, another me, one who was beaten and choked. One who was left alone to weep on the floor and wonder what she did wrong. But that is me no longer.
The pain leaves me, burned away by a surge of strength. My mind is clear and light. My skin has forgotten the cold. And I stand, feet steady as rock, and I look the monster in the eye.
“You will never hurt me again,” I say. “Know that. Even if you kill me now. Even if you rip me apart. I will feel nothing for you. Not anger. Not sadness. Not fear. Nothing.” I take a breath. “I am not afraid.”
The beast tilts his head, as if he hears something I do not. And then he charges.
One bite.
Deep into my neck.
My throat closes shut with blood.
My eyes twitch.
All I think is…
Nothing.
The beast rears its head. Letting me go. And I fly across the room. Past the pillars. Out into the sky.
I am falling, and yet I know, I will not fall.
I know it with a certainty I have always had. A certainty for things yet to come.
And a flash overtakes me.
More powerful than I have ever felt.
I don’t fight it. Not as I have before.
And as the energy courses through my body, I realize, it is not just visions I have. Not just a feeling of what will happen. It is power. Raw, uncontrolled power.
It takes hold of me.
And I do not fall.
I fly.
I am me, and yet I am not. There are things I do, and things done through me. My voice is mine, and not my own.
"I am the woman in the wild!" I scream into the shrieking wind. As I speak, lightning flashes, the fire of the torch blazes, and the clouds swirl around me. The pendant from the kitsune blazes at my throat. I am suspended in mid-air. My skin and clothes glow white, smooth and clear of any blemish, illuminating the dark sky. Illuminating the werewolf, who stands at the edge of the cathedral, jaw slack with wonder.
"I am the blood sister of the moon! I am the call of the night and her secrets. The radiance left from a star. I am all that you need and more than you know. I am the hidden that shall now be found. I am the magic that you seek. I am the wild!"
The wind thrashes at my words, so hard it pushes the beast backwards. He growls, barring his teeth. He bends his knees, preparing to leap.
“Do not move,” I warn. “Do not try.”
He howls one last time.
And jumps.
He swipes his claws forward mid-air, aiming for my neck.
He is nearly at me, when I raise my arm, and a gale of wind strikes down from above, so fierce and quick, it draws the clouds toward it like a tornado, and sends the beast falling down.
He does not land smoothly.
One might say, he does not land at all.
His body hits the tip of a gargoyle wing.
And the stone pierces his flesh, bursting from his chest.
I don’t recall the gargoyle wing being there. It wasn’t there last I looked.
But perhaps I’m wrong. I’m not myself right now.
I am the radiance of a star, burning away. And as the energy fades, I glide back toward the tower. The power is gone before I find my footing, and I collapse, not quite on solid ground. I reach to grab the edge.
Someone grabs me first.
Strong arms pull me close.
“I’m here,” he says, his warmth seeping into my body. “I’m here.”
And I drift away.
And dream of nothing.
The Fire
Through love, burning fire becomes pleasant light. ~ Rumi
My consciousness comes and goes in waves. I'm aware only of strong arms carrying me through the streets of the Otherworld, of Liam's voice alternating between chastising me for my foolishness, cursing himself for leaving me, and offering words of comfort. All of this comes in fragments, until it’s as if I’m with a different man altogether each time I awake.
Liam is a man at war within himself.
There is no winner in a war