time ago, and I don’t like to relive the past. Let’s say I faced an awful hell in a time that shaped my life. I overcame it thanks to the love and support of my friends and family, and I’ll never go back to that place again. And if I can bring a smile or a laugh to a child’s face who may be going through the same thing, it justifies the years of pain.”
“My intent is not to carry you back to a dark place, but I want to know exactly what happened to hurt you so I can erase those memories.”
“You do, Shaw. Every minute we’re together is more than I could have ever imagined. But those wounds are healed and I’ve moved on, never to revisit again. Please don’t ask me to.”
“Come here.” He extends his arms and I crawl into them. He positions me on top of him, tugging the sheet down so our naked bodies are pressed together.
“I’m sorry, it’s an overwhelming need to be with you all the time. I’d bring you to work with me just to have you close. Everything is perfect when we’re together. I’m not trying to eliminate your independence. I’m only trying to figure out a way for us to be together more.”
There’s desperation in his voice I’ve never heard before. I search his face and notice the uncertainty in his eyes. It’s the first time in my life I’ve ever seen any kind of weakness in him.
It scares the shit out of me.
“You’d tell me if something was wrong, wouldn’t you?”
He doesn’t hesitate, nodding a little too quickly. That uneasy feeling returns, but my inner voice says not to push too hard. I lean in and frame his face with my hands. “I’ll talk to Evie. Let’s start with adjusting my schedule. That will help with us being together more.”
“Thank you.” He closes his eyes and rests his forehead against mine.
“And, Shaw? I love that you want to take care of me, but we’re in this together. Which means, I take care of you, too. So if you need more from me, ask.”
His eyes fly open, the uncertainty gone, replaced with what I recognize as hunger and lust. He moves fast, twisting us so I’m on my back, and he’s hovering over me with a look of complete possessiveness. He’s hard again, brushing against my wetness, teasing me with short strokes.
My ankles link around his waist, and I tilt my hips at the right angle for him to slide into me easily. When we’re flush together, he leans in and nips at my lower lip before kissing a trail down the curve of my neck.
“Tell me you’re mine.”
“Always,” I moan, letting him take control.
Always…
Chapter 15
Shaw
Another shitty fucking week.
It’s been ten days since Sasha showed up with the news of her pregnancy and sent my world into a downward spiral. Bizzy knows something is wrong. I can see it in her eyes every time she looks at me. I can hear the worry in her voice and the faint plea with me to tell her. She thinks it’s all work related, and I’ve allowed her to believe it.
I’m the worst kind of asshole, for so many reasons, but I can’t bring myself to tell her the truth until I have scientific evidence. Especially after her heartbreaking confession. I wanted to know more, force her to tell me. Let me into that part of her I don’t know. But it became too much and the only thing I could do was make love to her, telling her over and over again she’s perfect.
I smooth my hand over my chest where there’s a dull thud and reach for the bottle of Aleve Gail has kept stocked since the day Sasha waltzed out. Throughout my life, I prided myself on my ability to handle stress, never allowing anything to weigh me down.
Not Law School…
Not the Bar Exam…
Not overinflated athletes’ egos…
Not endorsements gone wrong…
Not even watching career ending injuries that take out my clients…
But now, I can’t get through a day without a pounding headache that threatens to split my brain into pieces. The only time it recedes is the few precious hours I get to see Bizzy.
I check my watch at the same time Gail buzzes in. “Crenshaw, it’s time. I have a car waiting for you. Mr. Banks called and said everyone is coming.”
“Thank God.” I glance through the glass to see her sympathetic smile.