up scarring the kid for life. Though in hindsight my concerns were pointless, as I realized that you’d probably be pretty hard-pressed to find a ten year-old kid anywhere on earth that wouldn’t love the idea of having – as Ryland called them – superpowers.
Jocelyn told him almost everything about Holders in general: the different abilities, how you get them, and all about the Awakening process. Ryland was also happy to find out that there were other Holder kids attending St Brigid’s that he would be taking classes with, in which they would all learn more about their abilities, and how to use and control them – though he wasn’t thrilled about waiting a few more years for that part. The only things Jocelyn didn’t mention were the Iris, and anything about me other than that we’d recently discovered that I was a Holder too, and of course nothing about Darragh.
Lastly, Jocelyn had made sure to explain why it was very important to keep all of this a secret, and told him that he would have Min add a special charm to his Sciath that would make it impossible for him to divulge anything crucial to anyone who wasn’t a Holder. Ryland wasn’t happy about that, swearing up and down that he wouldn’t tell anyone, but I agreed that the charm was for the best. Contrary to Ryland’s assurances, secrecy has never been his strongest suit.
On the way out of the office Jocelyn handed me an index card with a building and room number on it, as well as a day and time.
“Introduction to Irish,” he told me. “You’ll want to familiarize yourself with the language, it will make things easier for you,” he said discreetly, knowing Ryland was still within earshot. “Professor Altus knows you will be joining. Your first class will be tomorrow at ten. Then tomorrow afternoon, if you are up for it, Taron and Min will give you your first training session. They will meet you in the Inner Chamber at three.”
“Taron?” I repeated with a grimace, not disguising my irritation. But come on, did it really have to be him?
“Taron’s Discerning ability is the most subtle, it will be the best one for you to start with.”
“Yeah, all right,” I said reluctantly, and left.
I walked Ryland up to the front of the building where he gave me a quick goodbye, then ran up the walk and off toward his dorm, excited to meet with his friends for dinner. As I watched his silhouette disappear through the line of trees separating Lorcan from the rest of campus, I was relieved that he was taking everything very well. Honestly, he probably didn’t even need me there at the meeting, but still, I was glad I had gone. It would have been really easy to chicken out again – umm… I mean, decline the invitation – to avoid spending more potentially irritating or awkward time with Jocelyn, but I am proud to say that I didn’t. It may not have been the most comfortable situation, but as the focus for both Jocelyn and me had been Ryland, it wasn’t all that bad.
The rest of the day was quiet and enjoyable, other than the funk I fell into whenever I thought about my conversation in the hall with Alex. It was that prickly, uncomfortable, slightly nauseating feeling you get when you are pretty sure someone is mad at you, but you don’t know why, and are too nervous to ask. That feeling that makes you hold your breath every time you turn a corner because you are terrified they might be there, and if they are, what are you supposed to say, and what will they say, and what if they don’t say anything at all, and you think that you probably shouldn’t say anything either…?
Yeah, uncomfortable funk.
Though more upsetting than the funk, was the general gloom that came with it. I hated knowing that Alex was having such a hard time, and that there was nothing I could do to help him – or nothing he’d let me do, anyway. As horrible as it may sound, when I first realized that something might be wrong with him I was actually kind of excited. It wasn’t that I wanted him to be sick or upset, but because I was happy at the idea of finally being able to really assist. To be there for him, the way he’d been there for me so many times over the last few