he prayed, that her resistance to him was growing thin.
He told himself that, and then he began to dress for his journey.
Nell arrived at Tom’s townhouse immediately following her arrival in London. She sent her lady’s maid on to her townhouse with her belongings. This was one interview she needed to conduct on her own. In truth, it was an interview she did not even begin to know how to proceed with.
How did she tell the man who had worshiped her for the last few years that it was over? That she was still in love with her husband and always would be? That she could not, in good conscience, marry him after all?
She had passed much of the journey deep within her own thoughts, imagining all the ways in which she might proceed. But she remained as ill-prepared as ever. Ever since Jack’s return, she had convinced herself this day would never come to pass.
Nervously, she awaited him in his front hall whilst his butler announced her. She was a common visitor here to his townhouse. Their relationship, such as it was, had not been secretive. Though they had not shared beds, she had played the hostess for him on many occasions amongst their set. In so many ways, his house was as familiar to her as Needham’s.
The footsteps returning to her now, echoing in the marble front hall, were not the butler’s. Tom appeared before her, his handsome face a mask of concern.
“Nell.” A deep vee of worry furrowed his brow. “The fortnight is not yet over. What has happened? Has Needham…”
She shook her head, feeling miserable. She knew what he was asking. Had Jack forced her? Of course he had not. Everything she had done with him—every kiss, every touch, each time they had made love—she had been perfectly willing.
“No, Tom,” she said quietly.
He searched her countenance and then gave a nod, his jaw tensing. “Come then, let us go somewhere more private where we can speak.”
He offered her his arm, and she took it, swallowing down a rush of emotion. When she touched him, she felt none of the awareness that radiated through her whenever she was in Jack’s presence. None of the attraction, none of the spark. Part of her wished she could.
But now that she was with Tom again, it was painfully clear to her that what she felt for him paled in comparison to the love she carried in her heart and the powerful magnetism she had always felt for Jack. There was something undeniable between them. It always had been, and it always would be. It was bigger than the both of them. It transcended time, distance, betrayal.
Time without him had fooled her into believing she could settle for someone else and be happy. That was not true.
Tom led them into a small, blue salon he often used for intimate entertaining. Though she had been within these four walls on many occasions in the past, tonight was likely the last time she would ever be welcome here. The thought filled her not with sadness as she had suspected it might. Rather, it lifted a weight from her chest. It buoyed her. It felt right.
She was making the right decision with Tom.
But it would not be easy.
“Would you care to take a seat?” Tom asked her stiffly. “Shall I call for tea?”
“No,” she said again, releasing his arm and stepping away from him. “And no, thank you. I will not be remaining long. Please forgive me for appearing suddenly, but I had to see you as soon as I could.”
Tom inhaled sharply, then released his breath. “You have chosen Needham.”
It was a statement rather than a question.
He knew her well, Tom.
She bowed her head, feeling as if she had betrayed his love and his trust. She had never meant to do so, but she had. And as someone whose love and trust had also been betrayed once upon a time, she knew how badly it cut, how deep the resulting wound.
“I am sorry, Tom,” she said painfully, struggling to find the proper words when there were none. “I am still in love with my husband. I always have been. It would be unfair to you were I to continue, knowing I do not feel for you what I feel for him.”
A muscle ticked in Tom’s jaw. “Have you forgotten what he did to you, Nell? Have you forgotten that he took another woman to bed and then spent the last three years abandoning