is now. I assumed something about myself, and now I know I was wrong. That is a great gift.”
“No. You have it wrong. Backward. You gave me yourself. You gave your passion. That is the gift. You owe me nothing, least of all gratitude.” He kissed her deeply, then gathered her into his arms and a peaceful silence.
She fell asleep soon. He waited until she dozed soundly before leaving. He looked down at her before going to the door. No wonder she had changed her name.
* * *
She awoke in the earliest hours to find herself alone. His presence still drenched the chamber, however. And her bed. She felt him there as if he still embraced her.
She rose and pulled the drapes so she might watch the dawn. A new day would start soon, in so many ways. She looked out the window, waiting for it.
It was never you. It was him. At first she had regretted that they had allowed Algernon’s specter to shadow their night. However, when Chase said those words, so forcefully, with such certainty—it had crystalized her own thoughts and reactions, and given voice to something she had dared not claim. She had long ago realized that all the rest had been his fault too, but with her utter absence of passion or pleasure—she had no experience, and could not know. Her deadened responses said the blame had indeed been hers. That she was lacking in the most essential part of femininity. Inadequate. Deformed.
It had taken five years to even begin to wonder if maybe she had it wrong. Dreams at first. Then her attraction to Chase made her truly hopeful. Now she knew for certain. Algernon had robbed her of many things, but this had been the worst. This was the one repercussion of that bad marriage that she had not been able to escape on her own.
She had not lied. She would forever be grateful to Chase. But, as she watched the black of night change to the misty silver of dawn, and saw the trees begin to take form, she knew that while he had been the right man for tonight, he was not the right one for anything more. Not even another tonight.
All those arguments against him that passion had obscured presented themselves again, fully clothed in their rationality. Worse, he may now be curious about her marriage, and ask her about it. Or ask others. Any chance that her old life would escape inquiry had just become less likely.
She left the drapes open, but returned to her bed, to await the sunrise. She inhaled what was left of his scent, imagined his embrace, and dwelled within the night’s magic for a few minutes more.
* * *
Chase wore the happy mood of a man well sated when he descended the stairs and entered the morning room. Nicholas looked up from his mail upon his entry.
“You have risen early,” Nicholas observed. “My excuse is I barely slept. What is yours?”
“I retired early. Remember?” Chase examined the sideboard, then filled a plate. Coffee already waited when he sat.
Nicholas continued perusing his mail. “Early though you are, you are too late to see off Mrs. Rupert. Rude of you. However, I took your place. I promised her that dinner when I return to London.”
The news caught Chase while he was raising his cup. He paused a second, surprised.
“You did know she was leaving, I assume.”
“Of course. Just not so early.”
“She sent her maid down to ask for a carriage to be hired and brought for her and her friend. The butler had the sense to offer one of mine instead, so off they went.” Nicholas turned another letter. “She said she had another assignment waiting and could not dally here, since her assistance to you was finished.”
“She said all of that, did she?” Chase dug into his breakfast.
“Well, I asked. Her departure seemed hasty to me. And I was planning that dinner tonight.” Nicholas set the stack of letters to one side. “She was most emphatic that we not disturb you, the way I suggested. I would suspect the two of you had a falling out, except she appeared not the least bit vexed. In fact she looked very contented. As did you when you entered this chamber.”
Chase kept eating. Let Nicholas probe, in his unsubtle way. Minerva’s assistance was over, for all intents and purposes. She had met with the servants. She merely had not told him what she had learned. And they had