double sink, with only Zack’s razor and toothbrush as proof he existed at all.
“Zack,” she whispered, stumbling toward the tub. “Are Zack and Kaley all right?”
“Fletcher found them.” Jay turned her around and tugged at the hooks fastening her bra. “They had to fight a handful of the Memphis wolves, but they made out okay.”
He peeled the sticky fabric from her chest, and Eden shuddered and closed her eyes. “I need to learn how to fight. Teach me. Promise.”
“We all need to learn a lot of things.” He unbuttoned her jeans. “I’ll get the water running.”
He bent toward the faucet as she struggled with her jeans, shoving the fabric down her legs in jerky stages, as if she could only concentrate on one tiny task at a time. Details. Little details, like the bite mark on Jay’s shoulder, or the linoleum peeling up in the corner, or the way her zipper felt cold under her feet when she stumbled free. If she focused on the details, then the world didn’t have to be real.
Jay’s quiet voice broke through the haze. “I’m sorry I didn’t—that I wasn’t in here with you.”
“No. No, Jay…” The numbness shattered when she touched him, and she clung to his shoulders and buried her face against his throat. “I can be strong for them, as long as I get to be freaked out with you.”
He locked his arms around her waist as steam began to billow up around them. “I knew this wouldn’t be an easy fight. I never wanted you to have to deal with this, but not because I thought you couldn’t. I didn’t have any doubts about that.”
Truth. It had a scent, a feeling, like the words took up more space. They echoed in her bones and she turned her ear to his chest, savoring the strong, steady beat of his heart. With him she was utterly safe, and no one should have to wait until they were thirty-two to know how that felt.
Her father had tried, but he’d made mistakes. The only way to be whole was to admit it. “I’m sorry I got defensive about my dad and Zack. I think I’m afraid to be mad at them.”
“No, hey. Come on.” He lifted her into the shower and climbed in after her. His hands moved with an efficiency that spoke of experience, of the fact that this was far from the first time he’d washed blood from flesh. “You don’t need to be thinking about that right now.”
“I do.” She tilted her head back and wiped beads of water from his cheeks. “I lie to myself about how I grew up. I pretend none of it hurt me because I wasn’t as bad off as Zack, and I tell myself my dad was great because he wasn’t Albus. I couldn’t let myself get angry about it, because it wouldn’t be fair to people like you and Zack, people who were hurt by their parents. Really, actually hurt.”
Jay stroked some of the tangles from her hair. “There’s more than one way to be hurt, Eden. And hurting for someone else can be just as bad.”
“I need to stop lying to myself.” Her tears mingled with the water, but it wouldn’t matter. She didn’t need to hide. “It makes me weak. Just promise you’ll be patient while I learn how.”
He tilted her head under the spray and soaped her hair before answering quietly, “It gets easier.”
It had to. The first step into truth was the scariest, plunging blindly off the ledge into free fall. But Jay would cushion her landing. And if it hurt too much, he’d help her put herself back together, just like he was doing now.
His hands were soothing as they smoothed away all external evidence of the fight. Eventually, the water swirling down the drain faded from red to pink. When it ran clear, they stood there under the spray, wrapped around one another. Eden pressed her lips to the healing scratch on Jay’s shoulder as the hot water pounded the tension from her shoulders, and wished the moment could last forever.
But it couldn’t. Too soon, the door rattled under a quick, efficient knock. “We need you guys outside,” Colin said, his tone almost apologetic. “Zack’s freaking out. I’m leaving clothes outside the door for you.”
Jay tensed and leaned out of the shower to snatch a towel from the rack beside the sink. “What’s wrong with him?”
“He says there’s a body missing. He’s trying to get Stella to cast