He could almost see her smile when she said that. Her beaming Shiner smile.
“My mom’s out on a date,” she said. “I’m all alone here. She won’t be back for hours. I thought maybe you’d like to come over.”
“That’d be great!”
Tanya.
Tanya would be calling soon.
He’d forgotten. He couldn’t believe that he’d forgotten. The promise of her call, of their later meeting, had been his sole focus, his obsession, all evening.
“Great,” Shiner said. “I’ll give you the address. Do you have a pencil and—?”
“Wait. I can’t. I can’t come over. It’d be great, but my mom’s here and there’s no way I can sneak out.”
“You don’t have to sneak out. Just tell her you’re going for a bike ride or something. It’s not all that late. I’d really like to see you.”
Jeremy sighed.
She’s alone, he thought. Jeez. We could do stuff, make out. She wants to make out, or she wouldn’t be asking me over with her mother gone. She wouldn’t risk it. She must really want me bad.
But Tanya.
“I just can’t,” he said. “Mom won’t let me out of the house. She grounded me because of last night. I got in late, and also she knew I’d been drinking. I really caught it. So she isn’t about to let me leave.”
“You won’t come over here, but you’ll go trolling.”
“Mom’ll be asleep by then. Besides, I only said I might go trolling, I didn’t say I would.”
“Did they go out last night after the party?” Shiner asked.
“I don’t think so. I went right home. Why?”
“Nothing,” she muttered. She was silent for a moment. “Look, if you can sneak out later for the trolling, you could come here instead. I’m sure my mom’s going to be gone most of the night. We’d have lots of time together. How about it?”
Shit! He could miss the trolling. He wouldn’t mind that. But the meeting with Tanya beforehand…
How do I get out of this? he wondered.
“Think up a good one,” Shiner said.
“Hey, come on.”
“If you’d rather be with Tanya, why don’t you just admit it?”
“It isn’t that.”
“No. I’m sure.”
“I’ll look like a chicken if I don’t show up.”
“I’m not going to beg, Jeremy. It’s your choice. Who is it going to be, me or Tanya?”
“That’s not fair!”
“Okay. Well, I guess that pretty much answers it. Good-bye.”
“Shiner!”
She hung up.
“Shit!” Jeremy jammed the phone down. He hurried into the bathroom, locked the door, and leaned against it. Baring his teeth, he pounded his fists against his legs. He slid down the door until the floor stopped him. He hugged his knees.
The bitch! he thought. Damn her! It’s not fair!
Fuck her anyway, she wants to be like that.
He clamped his teeth on his knees and bit hard enough to feel pain. The taste of his corduroy trouser leg was dry in his mouth.
I could’ve gone to her house, he thought.
He pictured himself on a sofa with Shiner in a dimly lighted room. He could feel her in his arms, feel her mouth against his. She was all soft and smooth, and she smelled of suntan oil.
His teeth loosened their grip. He closed his mouth and pressed his lips against the moist corduroy.
It would’ve been so wonderful.
So right.
It’s not too late, he thought. If I call her back…
Then I’d miss out on Tanya.
He saw himself in Tanya’s room last night, saw her standing before him naked and glossy, felt her skin under the slick layer of blood. Heat spread through the pit of his stomach. He felt the stirrings of arousal. He began to tremble, aching for her but afraid of her.
She’s bad, he thought. She’s probably crazy. I shouldn’t want her. I should stay away from her. What’s wrong with me? God!
So call Shiner. How? I don’t know her phone number. Not even her real name.
Jeremy heard footsteps in the hallway. Then came a knocking on the door.
“Honey? There’s a call for you.”
His heart lurched.
He crawled away from the door before answering, “I’ll be right out.”
He scurried the rest of the way to the toilet, flushed it, then got to his feet and hurried back to the door. He opened it. His mother looked at him, frowning slightly. “Is everything all right?”
“Yeah. Fine. Who’s on the phone. Shiner?”
“She didn’t say.”
“Must be. She told me she’d call back.”
As he hurried away, his mother said, “Now, don’t make any plans without checking with me first. You’re still in trouble around here, young man.”