awareness of how close he actually was, of where they were, and her state of undress.
And then, when the air between them had grown so thick she was sure the next step in their battle of wills would involve a demanding kiss, he straightened, took a step back, and raised an eyebrow. “Well, then?”
Shaken due to the visceral response he’d managed to secure, Ida took a couple of breaths and pulled the blanket up to her chin. “If you must know, I went to the docks.”
She hadn’t thought it possible for his gaze to harden any more, and yet it did. His fingers twitched. “Are you mad or just insufferably stupid?”
Ida flinched. Coming on the heels of the friendly atmosphere they’d shared the day before, his words cut deep – deeper than she’d have expected. Her eyes narrowed and without even thinking, she was suddenly on her feet, the fact she was dressed only in her chemise be damned.
“Neither, you conceited model of arrogant aloofness.” Heedless of the cold floorboards beneath her bare feet, Ida glared up into the face of condemnation. “I might be many things, but I’m not mad or stupid. Clearing my father’s name is first and foremost my obligation. I’ll not just sit here like some bland shell of a woman, waiting for you to solve everything.”
His breaths came heavily, with what appeared to be great agitation. “I explicitly told you to stay here.”
“Did you honestly think I would?”
“You disobeyed me.” The comment, low and dangerous, was spoken with both surprise and annoyance and even, she was surprised to hear, a hint of admiration.
Ida raised her chin and pulled back her shoulders. “We have an arrangement, my lord. Nothing more.”
He held her gaze with the sharp precision of a lion tracking a tasty gazelle. “Perhaps not, but the moment you agreed to stay here beneath my roof, you became my responsibility. So if you don’t mind, I’d appreciate a bit more caution on your part. Aside from the risk you took to your safety by venturing out on your own, you—”
“I can assure you I was never in any danger,” Ida told him tightly.
His hands were suddenly on her upper arms, gripping her so hard the action forced a gasp from her throat. “For Christ’s sake, woman, you went to the docks. Alone. After almost getting murdered the other day.” Wide eyes, tormented by something she couldn’t define, stared down at her. “However capable you may believe yourself to be, you’d never stand a chance against a group of sailors looking to have some sport. Unless of course…” He seemed to search her face for a moment before releasing his hold. Stepping back, he raked his hair with his fingers. “Was that the reason you went? To make some more blunt?”
The heated emotions he’d stirred in her during their argument withered and died. Ida shrank back and hugged herself against the cool air creeping under her skin. She’d never thought less of the women at Amourette’s. Over the years they’d become her family. She loved them, but in that moment she hated the idea of Fielding thinking she was like them – a whore who’d gone out looking for men she could service in exchange for coin. It pained her to think his opinion of her was so low, this was what he imagined of her. Yet she had no one to blame for his misconception besides herself.
“It’s not like that,” she whispered.
“I might believe you if you made an effort to prove yourself trustworthy.”
He wasn’t wrong. While Ida was tempted to rail at him for insulting her, she knew she had no leg to stand on. She’d lied and deceived him, thwarted his advice when all he wanted to do was protect her. If their roles had been reversed, she’d have been furious too, but after finally breaking free from her trapped existence, she was eager to act.
The thing she had to remember, though, was that she was no longer working alone. She had a partner to consider, a man who’d proven he wanted to help. Trust might not come easy to her anymore, but by not being honest with him, she was crippling their relationship and undermining their efforts.
“I’m sorry I went out by myself,” she said, deciding an apology might be the best place to start. “Would it ease your mind to know I took the pistol with me, just in case?”
He gaped at her. “No, it bloody well wouldn’t. That just proves