Flawed Heart: House Of Obsidian - Bella Jewel Page 0,66
hell would this happen to me now? I can’t cope with this right now.
Max certainly can’t cope with it.
Oh God, I’m pregnant.
How the hell am I going to tell him?
I don’t know, but I have to.
~*~*~*~
Max is staring at me, just standing there, staring. I want to open my mouth and let the words flow, but he’s been drinking and all I really want to do right now is punch him in the face. He’s sitting on the dining chair, practically glaring at me for calling him home urgently.
But this is urgent.
I have a baby growing inside me. Gosh, the very thought still makes me feel ill.
“Well, why am I here? What’s so urgent?”
“Have you been drinking?” I ask.
“Are you seriously going to pester me about shit that has nothing to do with right here and right now again?”
I sigh. “No, Max, I’m not. I just want you to answer the question. I need you to.”
“Yes, I’ve been drinking.”
“And gambling?”
He studies me. “What’s this about, Blue Belle?”
I flinch at his words, because he hasn’t called me that for a good month. It hurts and feels good at the same time.
“I need you to be honest with me, Max. I just . . . I just need you to be straight. Please, no matter what has happened in the last month, I need this from you.”
He studies my face, really studies it. Then he nods.
“Are you still smoking drugs?”
He nods.
“And gambling?”
He nods again.
My heart twists.
“Do you plan on stopping anytime soon?”
His eyes narrow and he sighs, running his hands through his hair. “Anabelle, this isn’t as simple as you think.”
“I’m a person, Max. I’m a damned person, and I deserve more than this. I deserve love and affection and a husband who cares. You told me you’d never hurt me . . .” My voice trails off and breaks.
I can’t look at him.
“So I’m asking you,” I push on, “I need honesty . . . please.”
“I don’t know if I’m going to stop,” he says, his emotion seeming to have been switched off.
“Are you going to tell me why this happened?”
His eyes flash. “What makes you think there’s anything wrong?”
Tears, ugly tears pour out. “So you’re just doing this because you feel like it? Because it’s fun?”
His eyes are hard again. The moment of softness is gone.
“Maybe I’m doing it because I don’t feel anymore.”
It’s as if someone has socked me in the gut. I take a shaky step back. “Pardon?”
“Maybe I don’t love you. Maybe I don’t want to be married. Maybe this is just a waste of time.”
I blink back the burning in my eyes, because what he’s saying can’t be right. He doesn’t love me anymore?
Suddenly, it makes sense. Him pulling away, him being an asshole, him making it clear what I mean to him. He’s fallen out of love with me—hell, maybe he never loved me in the first place. Maybe he just decided that it wasn’t fun anymore. Maybe he’s angry that because of me, he didn’t get the career he wanted.
“Is it because your life didn’t take the path you wanted?” I choke out.
“Maybe.”
I reach out and steady myself on the coffee table.
“It’s a simple answer,” I manage to say, even though my heart is splitting into a thousand tiny pieces. “Do you love me, or is it done?”
He stands, staring at me, his eyes scanning my face. Eyes that I love so damned much.
“No, I don’t love you anymore. I think we need a break.”
Agony rips into my soul and I wrap my hands around my belly, gasping for air. I never thought anything would hurt so much. His words penetrate into my very core and rip it into a thousand tiny shreds. Max . . . my lover, my husband, my best friend, doesn’t love me anymore.
“Did it ever mean anything?” I sob, brokenly.
“I honestly don’t know. Do yourself a favor, Anabelle—get yourself a better life. I’m not that life, and I think you need to accept that.”
He’s studying my face as if he’s waiting for something from me—I just don’t know what that something is. It almost looks as if he’s seeing how hard I’ll fight for him. What he doesn’t understand is that his words have ripped my already broken soul in half. If it was just me, maybe I’d fight, but I have a baby in my stomach.
So I say nothing.
His eyes flash, and then he closes off again and reaches over, grabbing his keys.
He says nothing more. He just