you sure?” I sassed. “Because in my experience, most guys don’t actually know what ten inches looks like.”
He burst into deep laughter, shaking his head as he slid his phone into his pocket. “Jesus, you’re funny.”
“I really can’t take credit for that.” I smiled. “I studied at the feet of Monty Python.”
“Oh, really?” He raised an eyebrow. “Favorite Monty Python?”
“Movie or sketch?”
“Sketch, of course.”
“Live or on record?”
“Holy shit, you are a fan,” he exclaimed. “Hm, dealer’s choice.”
“The Cheese Shop,” I said.
“Why?”
“It was equal parts silly and smart, plus I’m a sucker for comedy that contains absurd lists.”
He chuckled. “And cheese.”
“Oh, definitely. Always cheese.” I cocked my head. “What about you?”
“Mr. Creosote from the Meaning of Life.”
“Of course, that’s every guy’s favorite.”
“What can I say, I’m a sucker for vomit-based humor.”
I couldn’t stop a laugh as I mock-scoffed and bit out, “Ugh, boys.”
I hoped to god it covered up my glee at discovering his deep understanding of some of the funniest men on the planet and the brilliance they created.
“I got what I need, babe. Gotta head out.”
“Okay,” I said and walked him to the door.
He stopped in my foyer. “You want me to come back later? If not, I’ll be here tomorrow at four.”
I bit my lip and he grinned.
“Back here before seven,” he said, and walked out.
I closed the door… and panicked. I had two hours to prep.
I hadn’t waxed in two months, so I needed to take care of that pronto, and I should probably shave my legs. I decided a shower was in order and rushed back to my bathroom to do just that, getting sidetracked by the state of my bedroom.
“Jesus,” I hissed out. It looked like a tornado, then a hurricane went through it. I sighed. First things first, I needed to clean.
And I did. For an hour. I started in my bedroom and ended in my kitchen.
It was official. I was a pig.
Of course, it was just me. I didn’t have anyone I needed to be neat for, and my place was clean… just not tidy.
But justifications were my forte, and admittedly, this was just another one.
Once I was happy with my tidy up, I headed to the bathroom.
* * *
My doorbell pealed just as I flipped my hair over to put it into a scrunchy. Tripping down the hallway, I continued to try and wrangle my hair, managing to slam my elbow into the wall as I went. “Shit. Ow.”
I pulled open the door and Shadow frowned. “You okay?”
“Yes,” I said on a sigh. “I just whacked my elbow on the wall. Come in.”
“Why’d you whack your elbow on the wall?” He stepped inside.
“I was trying to contain my hair.”
“Your hair’s beautiful,” he said, and smiled. “Why are you trying to contain it?”
“Because when it’s down, it could be considered a lethal weapon.”
“Fair.” Shadow chuckled, lifting a bag of food and a drink carrier with two cups. “Burgers?”
“Awesome,” I said, closing the door and following him into my kitchen.
“I didn’t know what you wanted on it, so I had them put everything on the side.” He started pulling food out of the bag while I inspected the drinks.
“You bought shakes?”
“You gotta have shakes with burgers. Chocolate and vanilla,” he said as I shoved a straw in the chocolate and took a deep suck. “Your choice.” He looked up and grinned. “Chocolate it is.”
“Unless you really want chocolate,” I hedged, holding the cup closer to me.
“I’m good, babe. I actually prefer vanilla.”
“Sexually?” I asked, gasping quietly. “Sorry. Don’t answer that. I have no filter.”
He raised an eyebrow. “You want to know, you ask, sweetheart. I’ll answer any question you have.”
I nodded my head, focusing on my shake again in an attempt to hide my mortification.
“I grabbed ketchup and shit,” he said, pulling the packets out. “Wasn’t sure what you had.”
“Nothing. I have nothing.”
“No beer?”
“Oh, I have beer,” I countered. “Plus, wine and stuff to make margaritas. But that’s because I have priorities.”
He grinned wide and pulled open the fridge, grabbing a beer. “You want one?”
“Yes, please,” I said, and he handed me a bottle. I screwed off the top and took a sip, then popped a fry in my mouth. “What do I owe you?”
“Nothing,” he said, twisting the top off his beer. “I’m drinkin’ your beer.”
“This is beyond sweet, Shadow. Thank you.”
“Anytime.”
We ate for a few minutes in silence, and then I needed to fill the quiet.
“How often do you work at the firehouse?” I asked.
“Since I just earned my badge, I’m goin’