fifty rows of pews with about ten people per pew, but that was just one side, so…
My mind was so preoccupied that I missed the opening words of the minister, the Dearly Beloved part. I caught up at “Marriage is not to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly—but reverently, discreetly, advisedly, and solemnly.” I could give Claudius the solemn part, and he and Gertrude could apparently be discreet (which wasn’t the same as “using discretion”). As for the “advisedly” part? Not so much. This wedding seemed ill-advised at best.
The drone continued, and my attention waxed and waned. I perked up for “If any person can show just cause why they may not be joined together—let them speak now or forever hold their peace.” In movies someone always steps forward right around this part. In real life, they never do. Even when they should. It would have been awesome if Hamlet had come bursting into the sanctuary just then, or if some random earl had stood and pointed out how wrong it all was. I knew I didn’t have the courage to do it, but I momentarily hoped someone, anyone would. Sadly, no. The wedding carried on.
By the time Claudius and Gertrude were told to kiss, I was nearly crying from the pain in my feet and from my keen desire to be anywhere else. I decided not to think about the whole marrying Hamlet thing. We had a long way to go before that happened. And maybe I would change my mind about crowds and public scrutiny.
We recessed, and I winked at Horatio on the way out. I knew he wouldn’t be reassured until I actually spoke to him, but it would help. I decided to keep the actual reason for my distress to myself. It sounded bizarre, and I didn’t want to admit how far my imagination regarding my future had run.
Gertrude and Claudius took their damned time getting into their carriage, which meant we all had to stand on the steps of the church smiling and pretending it was all so fantastic. I stood next to my father and stared at the crowd like it was a growling dog, telling myself I wasn’t afraid of it.
We were driven to the formal, original part of the castle, where the reception was being held. A servant brought me bandages and sneakers, which I put on immediately after I was excused from the receiving line. Guests filled the room, and once a critical mass was reached, I was able to fade away.
Horatio and I stood on the side of the ballroom waiting for Hamlet, who Horatio assured me planned to show up at some point. We watched Claudius and Gertrude greet hundreds of people as hors d’oeuvres were passed.
Marcellus came up behind us. His gun holster peeked out from beneath his tuxedo jacket as he gestured with his long arms, and his badge glinted in the lights from the dance floor. “Lord Hamlet is here,” he announced.
“Thanks, Marcellus,” Horatio said.
Horatio and I went running out of the ballroom and found Hamlet coming up the spiral staircase.
“Hamlet!” we shouted.
He kept trudging up but did not answer.
Horatio met him at the end of the landing, and they shook hands. Then Hamlet walked past me without any acknowledgment.
“Hamlet?” I called after him, my stomach sinking. I knew he’d be pissed, but there was a part of me hoping that once he saw me, he’d be happy enough to let it go. Wishful thinking.
He heaved his book bag and it skidded across the lobby, then he reached for the door.
“Don’t go in there angry,” I begged.
He spun around and yelled, “But I am angry. I’m angry at my mother. I’m angry at those people for pretending this is all perfectly normal. Most of all, I’m angry at you.”
“Hamlet, what else could I have done?”
When Gertrude had asked, I hadn’t felt like I’d had a choice. I really hadn’t. And yet seeing Hamlet’s fury completely melted away all my rationalizations. His anger was justified, and I was an idiot.
“You could have said no. How could you walk down the aisle with her, stand next to her as she married my uncle?” He rushed back toward me and grabbed my shoulders, almost shaking me as he added, “You say you’re on my side, but your actions just told the world that what my mother is doing is right!”
Horatio came between us and moved Hamlet away. Hamlet shook him off and went toward the windows overlooking the city.