happen.
Oops?
Jacobs grunts.
I love you, my mind replies. To a grunt.
I shake it off and focus on my hand working my dick.
Jacobs’s sweat drops onto my back, and his rhythm falters.
I know he’s getting close.
“Teddy, I … I …”
The anticipation of him saying the exact words I’m thinking builds until I can’t hold back my orgasm anymore.
“I’m coming.” I explode all over my hand and the headboard. Not to mention his pillows.
Again, oops.
It’s really hard to care when my prostate is being pounded to the point I almost can’t take it anymore.
I take deep breaths and ride out my orgasm while Jacobs continues to take what he needs.
My hand on my cock stills. It’s all too much. Too much stimulation. Too much … everything.
Jacobs pulls out and flips me onto my back, and I know without a doubt I now have cum hair, but I don’t care.
Jacobs lifts my legs and slams back inside me.
“Fuck!” His hooded eyes scrunch closed, and it only takes three more thrusts before the sexiest moan falls from his mouth and warmth fills my ass.
He rolls his hips, milking the last of what he has left.
When he eventually pulls out and collapses on top of me, we both struggle to breathe.
His hot mouth peppers kisses along my collarbone as he makes his way up to my mouth, while his fingers slip between my ass cheeks. He circles my hole, then slides one finger back in.
“What are you doing?”
“Pushing my cum back inside you.”
Fuck me.
I cup his head and pull him into the kiss, pushing my tongue into his mouth.
Jacobs makes a noise at the back of his throat that sounds part whine and part needy, but then he pulls away and rolls off me.
He lands next to me and wraps his arm around my waist, bringing me as close to him as I can get. “That was …”
I lie in his arms, still reeling from the major revelation.
I’ve never been in love before, but that’s definitely what this is.
I think.
All I know is I’ve never felt this way about someone.
Instead of elation or clarity or any of those good things I should feel about it, all I can think is love at our age always ends.
For the first time in my life, I’m allowed to take everything into account and choose what I want to do.
My original plan was moving to New York. Jacobs probably still thinks that’s what’s going to happen.
He doesn’t know that I have an out, and he doesn’t know my future is up for grabs.
If he did and didn’t want to be a part of it … I don’t have the time or energy to go through heartbreak this year. Not with my new course load.
We lie like that in silence for a while until Jacobs recovers.
He leans up on his elbow. “I haven’t seen you for ages.”
I laugh to cover my anxiety over us. “Was it not me on the ice with you?”
“You know what I mean. We live next door to each other, we have practice and games together, but it’s like I never see you.”
“I’ve been super busy with studying. A shocking thing about me that you would have never guessed is I didn’t plan my classes accordingly, and now all my hard subjects are this year. I’m talking back-to-back lectures every day.”
Jacobs smiles. “That is such a Beck thing to do.”
I swallow hard. “Where are you thinking of getting a job when you graduate? Here in Burlington or …” I know the answer before I finish the question. “Near Dorset, I’m guessing.”
“That’s the plan. I want to be close to the farm so I can help out on weekends. Mom and Dad don’t have the money to employ more people, and my brothers aren’t going to be around forever. Rafter will be in college in two years.”
The distance between Colchester and Dorset isn’t a big distance—it’s about the same between Grant and his boyfriend, and they’re making it work.
“Maybe if I get out from underneath my father, your parents can adopt me and make me work on the farm.”
Jacobs scoffs. “You’ll need to build usable muscle, not the gym-made shit you’re carrying around. Besides, isn’t there more chance of pigs flying than getting out of working for your dad?”
Tell him about the deal.
“Yeah … probably.”
Idiot.
I know my reasons for keeping it from him are thin, but I guess I’m not ready to face it all yet.
I’m not ready to admit aloud that I’m terrified of failing.
I’m scared of