place, hoping it will give me a great perspective on what I am supposed to be doing with myself now that I’m no longer in the same place in my life.
“You still up?” he asks quietly.
“Yeah.” I lift my head a bit to look up to him.
“You should try and get some sleep, you had a long day. I’m getting ready to go to sleep myself.”
“I will soon. I’m just going to hang out for a bit more. You go, I’ll see you in the morning.”
“Alright.” He gets up from the couch to go to his room, but not before kissing me goodnight. His lips linger long enough to make me want more from him.
“Night,” I softly say and watch him walk off.
I watch TV a little while longer, until my eyes burn from tiredness. On the way to my room I pause at his door, putting my hand flat against the wood. My bottom lip quivers and I draw it in, resisting the urge to knock.
Once I’m in bed, I close my eyes and say a little thank you for everything that has been done for me.
Halloween has always been a holiday that excites me. I loved dressing up and getting candy while I walked around the neighborhood with my family. Even as I got older, I always loved seeing the kids, going around, knocking on doors, their faces lighting up when candy was put in their bag.
Rig has bought some candy to pass out, and I can’t wait till they come to get it. It makes the want to have kids someday even stronger. A dim light illuminates the porch and I sit by the window waiting.
“Dinner is ready.” Rig calls out, and I get up from my perch by the window.
“Smells great. Do you think the kids will be here soon? I want to make sure I’m ready when they get here,” I say before taking a bite of chicken.
“Um . . . yeah. They should be here soon.” Not very convincing.
“Why do you think nobody is going to come?”
“Well, because there’s a lot of space between the houses. It’s a pretty scarce neighborhood. I just don’t want you to be upset if nobody comes. I know how excited you are. Why is that?”
“A lot of reasons. It’s one of my favorite holidays besides the Fourth of July. Some of my favorite memories are from when I was a kid: dressing up with my sister, and competing to see who gets the most candy. We used to run from house to house, trying to get as many houses as we could before our parents would call it a night,” I recall.
“Who would win?”
“Well, I’m certain she would say it was her, but it was always me.” I giggle. “I would always plan my costumes out way in advance, telling my mom exactly what I wanted. She would make all my costumes by hand. She loved making them, and we would design them together. Same with my sister. We wouldn’t say anything until we dressed that night and presented them to one another.”
“Well, my parents just bought me and my sister’s costumes. We didn’t put that much effort into that, we were more concerned with getting candy.”
“My cousins would come over, and we would have pizza before we went out. Make it a whole family thing together. It was always such a fun time. God, I miss being a kid.” I finish eating, glancing at the door and back at the clock.
7:30pm rolls around and still not one kid has knocked on our door. Reluctantly, I turn off the porch light and sit down on the couch, not feeling the whole Halloween spirit.
Rig sits next to me and pats my knee. “I’m sorry, Parker. I know how excited you were to pass out candy.”
“It’s ok. Nothing I can do about it. I think I’m just going to go to bed,” I say, feeling defeated.
“No way.” Rig launches himself from the couch. “Go get some shoes on, we’re going somewhere.”
“I don’t really want to go anywhere,” I protest.” I’m just going to go to bed.”
“I promise to bring you home if you aren’t having a good time. Deal?”
“Fine,” I huff, and get up to slip on some shoes.
“Put these on.” He tosses something to me.
Cat ears on a headband. I smile at the gesture, and I’m sure he bought these knowing nobody was going to show up. It’s one of the main reasons why I continue to let myself