Escaping Parker - F.T. Zele Page 0,32
has escaped my usually hard exterior. Weakness wasn’t always my way of life, but it became that way the day I married Steven. I thought this was over, but it’s present tonight.
I sit in my new room and try to get a grip on my emotions. It’s a really nice room, nothing out of place, and it just oozes of money. The people here are extremely nice, but I’m so consumed in my own thoughts that I don’t even remember their names. I can tell they want whoever is staying here to be comfortable.
Rig is in the next room. We haven’t said much since the drive, but we’re both exhausted. Rig even more so since my shenanigans from the night before woke him up, and he probably hasn’t had a decent night’s sleep in five years.
Deciding there isn’t anything I need to be doing or want to be doing, I call it a night. After changing into something more comfortable, I crawl into an ultra-soft bed. It feels like a little slice of heaven and my body easily relaxes. I let my mind wander to endless possibilities of what’s to come, whether good or bad. I do this until I can no longer stand to lie in the same place and not be able to sleep.
Knowing I need a distraction, I get up and to check on Rig. Making my way to his room, I stand at his door, contemplating if I should knock or go back to my room. After knocking softly, I stand there waiting for him to say come in, but I hear no movement in his room and head back to my own.
Once I get back into bed, praying to the sleeping gods that they will come and carry me into the night, there is an extremely soft knock on my door. The door opens and Rig peeks his head in.
“Did you knock on my door? I thought I heard something,” he says quietly, standing in the doorway.
“Yeah, I did. I can’t sleep, which is weird considering this is the most comfortable bed I have ever laid on. You can come in, you know.”
“Ok. I am so beyond tired, I can’t sleep myself. Maybe it’s because this is the first time I’ve ever been here. Who knows?” He enters my room and sits on the foot of my bed.
The second he gets close to me, everything in me starts to come to life, just wanting to be near him. Rig brings me some unexplainable calmness that only existed before Steven came in my life.
“What are we going to be doing while we’re here?” I ask. It’d be nice to have something to look forward to.
“Nothing much, just waiting for the next place to go. There isn’t really much to do. Maybe we can attempt to go out somewhere, try and blend in a bit, pick up anything you need.” He lies back on the bed, resting his hands under his head.
“That’ll be fun. I mean I don’t really need anything, but I’ll take whatever I can get at this point.”
He sighs, and it leaves me wondering what’s going on inside of his head. There is so much I don’t know, and I only want to know more. I’m completely intrigued about how he works, how he gets through the days if he has nothing to look forward to when things are done.
“Alright, I’m going to try and get some sleep now. See you in the morning.” He starts to get up.
“Wait!” I say. “Can you just stay a little bit longer? I don’t want to be in here alone.” I kick myself for sounding so damn needy.
“Sure. I’ll stay for a bit.” He sits back down, an awkward silence hanging between us.
“This is going to sound so weird, and if you don’t want to I completely understand. Do you think you can just . . . maybe hold me for a little bit?”
“Parker,” he says my name like a warning.
“I’m not asking you for anything other than just to feel safe for the night.”
“I’ll stay with you till you fall asleep. How does that sound?” he says.
I scoot over, giving him some room to be comfortable. He does the gentleman thing and lies on top of the covers, putting some separation between us. It’s probably for the best, because I truly have no ulterior motive. He scoots closer, and I can practically feel the conflict going on inside of his mind. He lies stick straight, obviously