The Endless Road to Sunshine - Nicky James Page 0,104

was any possible way I could have been oblivious to Morgan’s crimes. People gathered at my house, screaming for justice, wanting me arrested. Only a moron could be so blind to not see what was happening right under their nose. They didn’t say it in so many words, but my parents were brainwashed by all the hype. They believed it. All the garbage. All the lies. In the end, they disowned me. Told me I was a criminal just like the man I married.” Jason laughed, and it was an ugly, terrifying thing that made the hair on my arms rise.

I stepped forward, closing our distance a fraction but held my tongue.

“When I came out as a teenager, they didn’t flinch. They supported me. They loved me. When I got suspended in high school, they didn’t go hard on me. They listened to my side of the story. They understood I was defending myself against homophobic teenage nonsense. But when my husband was arrested for murder, that was too far over the line for them. I couldn’t be blameless. They didn’t raise a stupid man, they said. But guess what? Yes, they did. I didn’t know a fucking thing.”

I moved another step closer. Taking a chance, I rested my hand on his back, rubbing over the rigid lines of muscle along his spine. It took a few passes for some of the tension to leech out, but even then, he wouldn’t move or look up.

“They were there, you know. In the courtroom. Every day, just like me. They heard it all, and even when everything was said and done, they still sided with the protesters who thought I should rot in a cell beside him.”

“I’m sorry.” Those two words weren’t enough, and they felt weak and lame when they passed my lips.

“I tried to go see them yesterday. I thought maybe enough time had passed, and we could make peace. Do you know what they did?” He didn’t wait for an answer. “They threatened to call the cops if I didn’t get off their property, then slammed the door in my face.”

Ouch.

I pushed Jason’s beer out of reach and encouraged him to turn around to face me. He resisted at first, but like he didn’t have enough strength left to fight, he eventually caved.

His eyes were tight and rimmed with red like he hadn’t slept in years or he’d been crying all weekend. The circles beneath were the same dark bruises they always were. Refusing to meet my eyes, Jason stared somewhere in middle space over my shoulder.

I tipped his chin around to face me, stroking a path over the rough stubble on his jaw. “What do you need, Jason? I’m here. Anything. What can I do?”

He worked his jaw, grinding his teeth and tensing. “I don’t know.”

“We could go to the bedroom, and I could try to take you away from all this for a while.” I wasn’t sure it would work. He was in so deep it didn’t feel like I’d be able to pull him out.

A tiny dip appeared in his brow. “That’s not why I messaged you.”

My heart cantered a little faster, and I stroked his cheeks more, wishing he’d look at me. “Then why did you message me?”

Again, he worked his jaw like he couldn’t find the words.

I waited him out.

When he finally found my face, there was a world—a universe—full of pain radiating back at me. His words came out so soft they could have blown away in a light breeze. “I like being around you. I feel so dead inside most days, and you’re so full of life.” His eyes filled, and he blinked several times to clear them. “I know we said this was… If you want to go, I understand. I just need… I just… need… I wanted you here with me.”

At a loss for words, I kissed him, stopping the stuttering uncertainty spilling from his lips. A single tear rolled down his cheek and landed on our joined mouths, tasting of salt and sadness. He took my waist, tentatively at first, and drew me closer. Our bodies aligned.

The kiss came to a natural end. Jason looked like a lost child, waiting for punishment or reprimand or instructions.

“How about we kick back with a movie? I’ll order food. Have you eaten?”

Confusion crossed his face again. “A movie?”

“Yeah. Just an easy, relaxing Sunday movie. You’ve had a stressful weekend. You deserve a lazy Sunday afternoon. We’ll have a snuggle-fest on your couch.