lip between her teeth as she nodded slowly. Maybe a few months ago she wouldn’t have been able to understand that line of thinking, but now she knew all too well how meeting someone could change the way you looked at the world around you, or even the way you looked at yourself.
“What made you want to marry Dad?” Andie blurted out, startled by her own question.
Andie’s mother flattened the box and slid it on top of the pile of cardboard that was waiting to be recycled. “Your father is a good man,” she said.
“I know that,” Andie said, “but I mean, there are a lot of good men out there. What made you want to be with him forever?”
She stopped, looking at Andie for a second as if she were trying to read her before she walked to the table and sat down on top of it, facing her daughter.
“Your father is an intelligent, kind, and honest person. When I met him, I knew he had a good head on his shoulders, that he was responsible. That he would be a good partner, a good father, a good role model, that he could provide for a family.”
Andie stared up at her, waiting for her to continue, but she said nothing else. Her mother could see that Andie was dissatisfied with her answer, that she wanted there to be more, and she smiled softly, shaking her head.
“What have I always told you, Andromeda?” She leaned over, playfully tapping her daughter on the forehead with her finger as she said, “Na agapas me to kefali sou, kai tha eisai asfalis. Love with your head, and you’ll be safe.”
“Love with anything else, and you’re in big trouble,” Andie finished in stereo with her mother, causing her to laugh. She brushed her daughter’s hair behind her ear before she stood from the table and turned to walk back out to the restaurant.
“What about your heart?” Andie said.
Her mother stopped just as she reached the door, turning to look back at her.
“What about if you love with your heart?” Andie asked softly.
She stared at a daughter for a second before she crossed the room to her, placing her hand on the side of Andie’s face. As she looked down, she smiled softly, and Andie could have sworn there was a hint of sadness behind it. She leaned down and kissed the top of Andie’s head before she turned and walked back out to the restaurant, saying nothing.
Andie fell back in her chair, the force of her sudden epiphany hitting her like a tidal wave.
It was like the world had just righted itself in front of her eyes.
Maybe loving with her head was what worked for her mother, but Andie knew at that moment, knew with a certainty that she had never felt about anything in her life before this moment, that it wouldn’t work for her.
She did love Colin. It was never an issue of not loving him. He was a good guy, and he was kind, and predictable, and stable, and safe.
She just didn’t love him with her heart.
She didn’t burn for Colin; she didn’t melt for him. He didn’t make her want to be a better person. He didn’t challenge her, he didn’t inspire her, he didn’t make her feel like the world was at her feet, like anything was possible. Andie knew what it felt like to experience those things now, even if it was just for a moment.
She wanted to experience them again.
She sat up straight in her chair, quickly saving her work and closing down her computer.
Her hands were shaking.
She wasn’t sure what she was going to do, but she felt like she needed to take some kind of action. It was like a veil had been lifted from her eyes, and now that she could see everything clearly, she didn’t want to waste anymore time.
She had to talk to Colin.
She needed to see Chase.
With trembling hands she shoved her laptop back into its case and swung it over her shoulder, walking briskly to the door and flinching suddenly as it swung open and sent her stumbling backward.
“Shit! Sorry, are you okay?” Tracey laughed, reaching out to steady her friend.
“Jesus! Why are you storming in here like a maniac?”
“I didn’t storm, I just opened the door. It’s not my fault that you were charging it like a bull from the other side. Where the hell are you going in such a hurry?”
“I just…I have to talk to Colin,” Andie