doing and counting the steps in her head that she hadn’t noticed he had been drawing her in closer and closer until her breasts brushed against the hardness of his body. Gasping, she looked up, only to get caught in the mesmerising green of his eyes.
They stared at each other for a few moments, both tense and unsure, before Mordecai cleared his throat. “Are you sure you’ve never danced before? You’re doing a good job.”
Dana flushed under his praise, liking more than she should the feeling of happiness kind words from him brought. Gods, am I really that starved for affection? she wondered to herself. Or am I simply starved for him? “I really have not. I hardly have the time for such things. Besides, who would I dance with?”
Mordecai cocked his head, looking genuinely curious. “There aren’t any other people, or gods or whatever, in Otherworld?”
“Of course, there are. It is a world just like this one – only filled with lives who have already lived – or are yet to live,” she explained.
“Like the Christian idea of Heaven and Hell?” Mordecai asked.
Dana scrunched up her nose as she thought about the best way to answer. Theology and ideology were complex topics. “Kind of. It is a realm or another plane of existence, I guess you could say. The same as Heaven and Hell. Those exist too.”
Mordecai stopped moving. “Really?”
“Of course. There are as many places for the dead and the yet to be born as there are the gods that construct them,” Dana explained. They had stopped moving but Mordecai seemed to have forgotten that he was still holding onto her. She felt no need to remind him.
“So … there are other gods?” Mordecai asked. “You’re not … it?”
Dana chuckled, “It? No, not at all. Seriously, Mordecai, you have been alive for over a millennium. You are a keeper of the element of death. How can you be so ignorant of other gods?”
Mordecai frowned, “It’s been a long time since any history was taught to our paladins and wardens. And what was documented over the years was lost when Garret destroyed the Warden Chronicles. I guess …” he paused, considering his words. “I guess I have forgotten as much as I have learned.”
Dana did not know why she was so surprised to hear the admission, but she was. Was Mordecai correct? Was she so out of touch with her own creations? How could she not know how ignorant and uneducated they had all become? “Because I was so focused on my own needs and my own desires. I was focused on our daughter,” she suddenly understood.
“What are you talking about? Dana?” Mordecai lifted her chin, forcing her eyes to meet his once again.
Dana shook her head, breath shuddering out. “You are right – I am a terrible goddess. I failed my people. All these years, I was so focused on Max – focused on ensuring she lived up to her destiny that I did not realise I was failing at my own.”
Mordecai finally let Dana go, spinning away from her and running his hands through his hair. He stood with his hands on his hips and his back to her as he shook his head, cursing nothing and everything at the same time. Finally, he spun back around. “No,” he stated, harshly. “No. I was wrong. I’m a fucking self-righteous prick who has no idea what he is talking about. You’re right – I know nothing about you; how you live, what rules you follow, what your damn job is. I’ve just been so fucking angry, Dana. Angry with myself and with you. Angry with the whole fucking world. I was hurt and guilty and lost, and all I could think about was finding Max and hurting you. I thought if I did that, everything would all be better. But it hasn’t worked that way.”
Dana smiled knowingly. “I know exactly what you mean. As soon as I felt Max spark to life inside of me, nothing else mattered. Literally. Everything became about her. It is what any good mother should feel,” she allowed. “But not what a good god should feel. This is why we aren’t allowed to create life with our own bodies. Why we should not have our own children. The conflict is too great. Priorities change …” Dana murmured, speaking of her and her deity colleagues. Tempus, Tanda, I am so sorry, she prayed. “I must leave now,” she informed Mordecai, her mind reeling with