of my finger. There was something wholly erotic about this—about watching what I was doing.
My breathing turned shallow, and in an instant, I saw Colton’s head bowed between my thighs instead of my hand, and it was his fingers instead of mine, his mouth. The tension coiled and then unraveled without warning, whipping throughout me. I kicked my head back, crying out in the silence of my bedroom. The release was more intense than anytime I’d ever done this, shocking me.
Closing my eyes, I let out a long sigh as I slowly pulled my hand away, letting it rest on my belly. God, my hormones were out of control.
Actually, my emotions were out of control, but in a very good way. My lips curved up at the corners, forming a small, sated smile. I blinked open my eyes, my gaze focusing on the ceiling. My muscles were nothing and moving from this bed was the last thing I wanted, but I…
I felt…alive.
* * * *
Colton really did know the way to my heart.
Crab rangoons.
When he showed up Sunday evening, he’d brought a delicious array of takeout, including my weakness, which existed in the form of crab and cream cheese. He’d also brought a movie with him since I’d replaced the TV a few days ago. It wasn’t nearly as nice or as big as the first one, but it would have to do until I could justify spending hundreds of dollars on a larger TV. He’d brought with him a remake of an old-school horror film that had traumatized me as a small child, and when we finished dinner, he popped the movie in.
We started off sitting side by side, but before we were even fifteen minutes into the movie, Colton stretched out his long body across the couch. He managed to coax me down so I was lying beside him, my head tucked against his arm and his hand resting lightly on my hip.
At that point, I pretty much stopped watching the movie.
Kevin and I had done this so many times, favoring bumming around the house many Saturday nights instead of going out. I expected there to be a pang of sorrow, but what I felt was a shadow of the hurt I had lived with in the months and even years after his death. I knew beyond a doubt that if Kevin was aware of what I was doing right now with Colton, he would be happy. Knowing that made it easy to relax against Colton.
But that relaxation quickly turned to keen awareness. With every breath Colton took, I was conscious of just how close we were. The scene of a screaming girl on the TV became nothing more than background noise as I focused on every part of our bodies that touched. The front of his thighs pressed against the back of mine. My bottom was almost cradled in his lap and his hard chest was against my back. I bit down on my lip as I wiggled a little, stopping the moment his fingers of the hand resting on my hip curled, bunching the thin material of the dress.
I thought about what I had done this afternoon, touching myself while thinking of him, and my body flushed hot. Not from embarrassment, but from sharp arousal.
“Are you watching the movie?” Colton asked, his voice deeper, rougher.
I had a choice. I could pretend that I was or I could fess up to the fact I had absolutely no interest in the movie at the moment and that it was him who had my attention. It wasn’t…easy to initiate this. My seduction skills were below amateur level, but what had I decided earlier? Not to be a coward. To live life despite the risk of getting hurt. To…to just let go.
Before I could give myself time to overthink, I shifted onto my back and lifted my gaze to his. Our eyes held for a moment and then his gaze dropped to my mouth. I knew that whatever I would say would probably be completely idiotic. I decided action was probably better than words.
Because words could be really hard.
I lifted my hand, pressing my palm against his clean-shaven cheek. My heart stuttered as he turned his head slightly, dropping a kiss against the center of my hand. Oh God, that was too sweet, almost too much. I started to pull my hand away, but I stopped myself as his gaze returned to mine. Drawing in a shallow breath, I guided