upstairs. There was no way Merdon would stand up to Brenna because she was part of a package deal, and Thallirin wouldn’t take kindly to Merdon trying to boss around his woman.
It only took a minute for me to put on pants, toss my hair up, and throw on a sweater. Brenna was still by the door, glaring at Merdon when I returned.
“All set,” I said, noticing Emily’s worried expression too late to dampen my chipper tone. “I’ll be back in time for lunch. Promise.”
She nodded, her gaze shifting to Merdon. Brenna noticed.
“You’re welcome to come with us,” she said.
“No, that’s okay. I have stuff to do here. I’m planning to take a few things to Tenacity later, and it’ll need a bit of coordinating.”
“The cookies?” I asked.
She nodded.
“I’d love to help. If I’m allowed to go with you.” I looked pointedly at Merdon. “Am I?”
He stared at me, his expression impassive.
“Of course you’re allowed,” Brenna said. “A trip to Tenacity sounds fun. I think I’ll join in.”
“Perfect.” I grabbed my coat. “I’ll see you guys later.”
Brenna held the door for me and closed it behind us as we left.
“Your timing couldn’t have been better,” I said with a grin.
“So I gathered. Does Merdon often keep you from leaving?”
I lost some of my humor.
“He did the first few days when I was going through withdrawals. Once those were over, he let me out but always keeps a close eye on me.”
She was quiet for a long moment.
“My mom drank a lot after the accident. She wanted to forget the pain and what she’d lost,” she said. “It’s a tempting solution, at first glance. But a person never really forgets, you know?”
I did know. Even when I was drunk, I still knew why I was drinking. My sins were always there in my head, condemning me. The alcohol just made me care a little less at the time.
“I tried what you said,” I said, changing the subject. “Talking about stuff didn’t help.”
“Since I just mentioned that yesterday, I think it’s a little premature to decide if it was helpful or not. Especially if you tried with someone in your house. Not sure those two are the right crowd.”
I wasn’t sure anyone was.
We walked toward the practice circle in silence until Brenna swore under her breath.
“What?” I asked.
“He’s already there.”
“Who?”
She gave me a troubled frown.
“Merdon. Who else?”
I shrugged lightly.
“Fey follow women around. It’s just what they do.”
She stopped walking and grabbed my arm.
“They don’t try to trap them in their houses or bite them.”
“Yeah, the normal ones don’t. Merdon’s not like the rest. But then, neither am I.” I gave a slight shrug, his words from yesterday echoing in my head. Merdon was right about me not wanting Shax’s level of nice. But a little bit of nice wouldn’t hurt.
No, wait. What was I thinking? I didn’t want nice from Merdon at all.
No fey. No way. Yet, I’d broken all the rules that were meant to keep me happily unattached. Was there even a chance that I’d escape the fate that Merdon had planned for me?
“Given the state of the world, the odds aren’t in my favor that I’ll live to see my nineteenth birthday,” I said, thinking aloud. “The chances of me still being single until then are even slimmer. What would you say those odds are?”
“If you stay here? You’re as good as claimed already. If you move to Tenacity, maybe you’ll be able to stay single. Is that what you want?”
“What I want and what I need might not be the same.”
She gave me a small smile.
“It’s smart of you to recognize that. But, no matter what you think you need, no woman ever needs abuse. And I’m worried that’s what you’ll get if you stay here.”
I gave her concerns serious consideration.
“I don’t think so. I think Merdon’s giving me the distraction that I need right now while I try to figure out how to deal with everything that’s going on in my head.”
“There are better ways to distract someone.” She indicated her bow. “And he’s stopping you from that.”
I grinned at her.
“Is he? Because I’m on my way to practice with you, and he didn’t try to stop me once you said I was going.”
She sighed and released my arm.
“The fey are far too pushy,” she said.
“I agree. But not with women they don’t consider their own. You can be my muscle, and I’ll be yours if you ever need it.”