if you want,” Connor says.
“I’m good, but thanks.”
I start to step inside, but he’s still standing there. I turn, and he’s looking at me, looking right into my eyes. He does this sometimes, a lot of times. He looks at me like he’s waiting to see if I can read his thoughts, like he wants to tell me something, but it’d be so much easier if he didn’t have to use words. But I can’t read his mind. Even if I could, I think I’d be afraid to. Connor’s mind has to be full of amazing things, like state championships and political issues he knows inside and out because of debate and maybe even plans to someday cure cancer.
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My thoughts are more of the Nazi zombie type. I just want to kill shit.
Connor sighs, his eyes finally leaving mine. I’ve failed the test again. If he had a better twin, a more worthy twin, we’d be able to have psychic conversations, and I’d ace every test in school because he could “think” me all the answers.
Emma takes Connor’s hand, and they start to walk toward his Jeep. I start inside again.
“Are you sure?” he says, his body sideways like he’s torn between coming inside with me or going with Emma. “It’s tuna casserole. We could get a pizza.”
“I’m good,” I say again, and I hate how he’s looking at me, like I’m rejecting him. With all his admirers, does he really need one more, and does it have to be me?
I have to get away from him. His aura, or whatever the hell it is, is too damn bright. My skin, my pale epidermis, is starting to burn. Connor needs to leave. Then I just have to get through dinner, so I can shrink back into the shadows of my basement sanctuary.
Emma pulls him toward the Jeep, and he follows. He walks her to the passenger side and opens the door, but before getting in, she looks back at me and smiles.
I remember the first time he brought her home. He was a freshman, and I was in that hell called middle school. They’d walked to our house after school on a Friday because Mom was going to serve as chauffeur for their first date. Connor and Mom went into the kitchen to discuss rules and curfews, and Emma sat down next to me on the sofa. We watched television 1 4
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for a few minutes and then she started talking to me. She asked me if I liked sports, and when I said no, she asked me what I did like. I started talking about gaming, and she seemed interested. Interested in the games. Interested in me.
She noticed me.
When Mom and Connor came back into the living room, Emma got up, and I thought that was it. Once the great Connor was back, I disappeared again. But as they were walking out the front door, Emma turned and smiled at me. That was four years ago, and she’s still giving me that smile.
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uess what I heard.”
It’s the voice of Teddy Eskew. As if spending the day sitting amongst Connor’s adoring fans isn’t bad enough, now I have to put up with the school’s biggest asshole.
“I heard you and your brother were Siamese twins, joined at the dick, and when the doctors separated you, they decided to give what there was to your brother. That’s why you have to piss sitting down.”
Teddy doesn’t ride the short bus to school, but he can’t get it through his head that Connor and I are twins, born two years apart. Somehow he got the idea that I’m a sophomore while Connor’s a senior because I had the cord wrapped around my neck. Lack of oxygen made me delayed. Teddy’s a senior, and he and I are in two classes together. He’s the one who’s delayed. He’s also the one on probation for vandalism, underage drinking, exposing himself to a minor, and attempting to grow facial hair like Wolverine from X-Men.
“You made any summer plans yet?” I ask as I push past him, balancing two hot dogs and a can of Diet Coke in my hands. “I 1 6
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heard there are lots of unsupervised kiddies at the water park if you want to